First, baby is fine. And yes there IS a baby in MY uterus...with a HEARTBEAT! Let me tell you the story.
I was having some cramping this morning when I woke up. Nothing too bad and I have the cramps on and off so I wasn't too worried. As I was riding to work on the bus, they became pretty intense. They felt like very strong menstrual cramps. These were the worst I've felt through this whole process. I had to breath deeply through a few of them, actually. When I stood up to get off the bus and took a couple of steps, I felt wet between my legs. I knew immediately that it was blood. I have had a few episodes of CM since becoming pregnant, but this was a LOT of wet and I just knew it was the beginning of the end. I walked to my building as fast as I could, all the while feeling more and more wet. I barely kept it together until I got to the bathroom. Sure enough, my undies were soaked with blood. Not brown, but red. It was a stain just bigger than a silver dollar. I started crying. I peed and wiped and there was more red on the toilet paper. I sent BJ a text telling him that I thought I was losing the baby and about the blood and that I was calling the nurse.
My nurse was very calming and called the office where I'm seen asking if I could come in today. She came back on the line and told me that they would see me as soon as I got there. She also said that it's normal and that everything was probably ok. I know that cramping and spotting are normal in early pregnancy. However, this was not spotting...this was bleeding. And when cramps and bleeding are combined...it's not usually a good outcome.
I told the second in command that I was having a medical issue (through tears so I'm sure she knows what's up) and that I had to leave. I called a service for commuters that ride the bus to arrange to get back to my vehicle. I had to take the metro and then wait for a cab and the cab took me to my truck. And wouldn't you know that just as I'm about to get on the metro train I get my 6 week update message from my babycenter app. Just what I needed to send me to tears again. I put a panty liner on before leaving work so I could track if there was any new bleeding.
BJ and I were in constant communication and he was telling me how much this sucked. And then he did the only thing he knows how and reminded me that this would not be the end...we have frosties and 5 more fresh cycles to get through. He said that he hoped I didn't have to go through this 5 more times. Me too, buddy. Of course, I was praying (begging) the whole time for everything to be ok.
I arrived at the clinic and waited less than 10 minutes to be seen. Of course. on my way in I passed 2 pregnant women and one woman with a newborn. Cue more tears from the hysterical Infertile. Dr. M. came in and asked me what was going on. I explained and then laid down on the table. In went the wand as I stared at the ceiling. He told me to look at the screen and then said "congratulations!". I was terrified to look at the screen for fear of seeing nothing. The tears were streaming down my face and I turned my head. He pointed to the little bean and then said, "do you see that? That is a heartbeat!" I said, "are you sure it's flickering? I can't see it through my tears." He zoomed in and sure enough, there it was...a beautiful little flashing light. He looked all around at everything and could not find the source of the bleeding. He thinks it's just one of those things in early pregnancy that likes to scare us. He gave me a hug and told me congratulations again. They printed out a picture that I get to show BJ when he gets home. We still go in tomorrow for our appointment where they will measure everything and give me the bpm on the heart rate.
I'm so relieved. I sent BJ a text right after the tech left the room because he was very upset that he couldn't be there with me. I called him after I left and he told me that he looked up my symptoms on his phone and pretty much agreed with Dr. M. :-) Sometimes there's no real reason for the bleeding and everything is fine. I hope things continue to be fine. Dr. M. looked at everything, including my cervix, and said everything looks great. I hope he's right. I was sent home to chill today and that is exactly what I'm going to do now. I'm wiped out. I spent an hour and 30 minutes on the bus, then took the metro, then a cab brought me all the way back to my truck and then I drove another 70 miles (or so) round trip...it's time for a nap. Oh, and aside from a little brown spotting, I haven't seen any more blood. Fingers crossed that was the end of it.
I'm hoping to share more good news tomorrow!