When I opened my Timeh.op this morning to see what cute picture I had taken of Baby Girl this date last year and the year before, I was jolted back to this day one year ago…
I had dropped her off at daycare like any other day. She was sweet and cute and smiley. I had been working for about half an hour or so when my cell phone rang. I saw the daycare’s number on the screen and knew something must be up. We will name the daycare provider CJ. CJ proceeds to tell me that my sweet girl has a fever of 101.5 and that I should come and get her. Drats. It’s up to me because BJ is on a big job that he was starting that very morning and he had all of his equipment on site and he wasn’t really reachable. So I finished up a few quick things and started on my way.
About 15 minutes into my journey, (after I left BJ a message that I was going to pick BG up) my phone rang again. It was CJ. My heart skipped a beat as I shakily said hello. This is what she said:
Yeah, something isn’t right. I think I’m going to have to call 911. BG is lethargic and not really responsive.
My heart sank and my stomach turned. My mouth went dry and my breaths became quick and shallow. I told her to definitely call the ambulance and that I was on my way. I told her I’d call BJ again. I could barely concentrate on anything. I began crying and begging God not to take my baby from me. I called BJ and left him another message. My next thought was to call my sister in law because she lives very close to daycare and I wanted someone from the family with her until I could get there. I called and got her voicemail. And then I lost reception and was cut off before my message was complete. I dialed again. She answered and I hurriedly told her the situation and asked her to go over there. She left right away. BJ called me and I had to tell him everything again because he didn’t listen to his message. He was leaving the worksite and heading to the hospital. I called CJ to see what was happening, and so did BJ. It was a frantic 45 minutes after that. There were so many phone calls going back and forth between everyone. CJ quickly told me that BG seemed ok but she could tell that BG didn’t feel good. They were playing outside and CJ was holding her. She put BG in a small chair while she tended to another child. When she turned around BG was slumped over and she thought she fell asleep. Her eyes were slightly rolling backwards and she was pretty limp.
My SIL rode with BG to the hospital. She was talking to me while on the way. I’m crying and can hardly focus on the cars around me. I was trying to keep myself aware of my speed. I told her that BG had fallen the previous day and busted her lip on the hardwood floor but that she was fine after that. I mentioned a bug bite she had on her lower back. I was trying to think of anything important to tell them. My mind was racing. I gripped the steering wheel so tight my hands ached. I was holding that steering wheel like I wish I had been holding my daughter. I remember just begging and begging God to let her be ok and not to take her from me.
I finally arrived at the ER and went to the front desk. I was told she was in the waiting room. What? I hurried over there and my SIL was holding BG and BJ was filling out papers. BG didn’t even raise her head when she saw me. She didn’t reach for me. Nothing. It was like she didn’t even know who I was or that I was there. I was so scared when I saw what condition she was in. She was drooling on my SIL’s shoulder. I took her and held her. She was dead weight in my arms. I asked what the hell was going on and why wasn’t she being seen? I went to the check in desk and told them that they needed to get someone to look at her because something was very wrong.
They sent someone out and thankfully it was an old friend of BJ’s. I frantically but coherently told him that something was very wrong because this was not my child. It took some hemming and hawing but I finally got him to agree to take her vitals again. They had said she was stable in the ambulance so they weren’t rushing her treatment. Her temp had gone down a little but her heartrate was up. And she didn’t even care that they were messing with her. This child can’t stand when strangers touch her or even look at her so I knew something was very wrong.
We spent the next several hours talking to staff, holding my girl down so they could put the urine catcher on her lady parts (that was awful), forcing Motr.in and Tylen.ol down her throat (she finally started fighting back), wrapping her up like a burrito so they could draw blood and start an IV of fluids. They decided to do a chest x-ray. They wheeled us down to the x-ray room on the bed. They asked me if there was a chance I was pregnant and my answer was yes (more on that later) so I could not go in with her. It killed me to be away from her. I was standing in the hall for less than 5 minutes but it felt like an eternity. She was inside that room and I couldn’t hear or see anything. When the door opened, BJ was holding her and she was wearing a hospital gown. She was the cutest little patient I had ever seen. And she SAW me. She REACHED for me. She was ALERT. I don’t know what happened but she seemed to be getting better. I took her in my arms and just squeezed her.
Back in the room they gave us a bottle with some water in it. She started drinking it and she even smiled and acted a little goofy. Her poor arm was wrapped in one of those hard plastic things to keep her from getting to her IV and bending her arm. She didn’t like it very much but she was a trooper.
Everything came back normal. They looked in her eyes and her ears and they said that she had a bit of an ear infection. Then they told us she was dehydrated and they were sending her home. Um. Ok. She was drooling and crying real tears and she filled her diaper and her fluid catcher…that doesn’t sound like dehydration to me but whatever. They didn’t find anything else and told us to see her Ped the next day. BJ went back to his job site while I waited for us to be released. They thought that maybe she had a seizure from her fever but they never confirmed that and I guess there’s no way to accurately prove it. She was never shaking or twitching, just lethargic and non-responsive.
CJ came by our house that evening and recounted everything that happened that morning. She said that BG drank plenty of milk that morning with her breakfast so she didn’t know where that diagnosis came from, either. I was so touched that CJ wanted to come over and check on BG. She had been so scared, too. In 14 years of being a provider she had never had to call 911. Leave it to us, right?
The Ped saw BG the next morning and was confused as to why they said she was dehydrated, too. He said her numbers were a little low but that it did not constitute dehydration. Hmph Stupid ER. He checked her out and did a few tests on her to gauge her mental state and seemed happy with all of her responses. He also said that her ear was a little pink but not much.
Needless to say, that was the scariest day of motherhood so far for me (at that time…more to come). BG has had much higher fevers since then and has never had that reaction. Her Ped thinks it was some sort of neurological episode but without a recurrence we will never really know what happened that day. Thanks to Timeh.op I just relived that whole experience. It makes me want to shudder. I thought for sure that God was going to take her from me and I was so far away from her that she would “go” without her mama by her side. I was certain that day that the dreaded other shoe was falling. I love that little girl more than my own life and I am forever grateful to have her and that she is healthy.