Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Another One

When it rains it pours and apparently, it's raining like crazy in my neighborhood. While we were waiting for our pizza that was in the oven, our neighbor down the hill, Rick, came to pick up his plant that we were watering while he and his wife (girlfriend, really) were on vacation for 2 weeks. While we were on the porch chatting, Steve, the neighbor right next door to us came out and everyone was talking. I came in to check on the pizza and BJ bursts into the front door to come and get something and blurts out to me...."yeah, so Kim's pregnant". WHAT?? Yes, the neighbors that I wrote about here have conceived their 3rd child. She's due on 3/17. I completely lost my appetite and started crying when BJ was safely back outside with the guys. Why my husband thinks it's ok to just blurt these things out to me 2 seconds after he hears them I will never understand. Then he thinks it's ok to joke about it by saying things like "Maybe you need to drink more of the water from around here, it's obviously in the water." The man has no sympathy tactics. He wasn't raised with any, obviously.

I can ignore the other pregnant lady on the cul de sac because I don't talk to her anyway or see her much. However, Kim and I talk and see each other frequently. This sucks. It's times like these that make me want to just quit. I don't have much time left for trying anyway, so why bother stressing myself out? Of course, I will keep trying for now, but good grief...when will it be my turn? For most of the time that BJ and I have been together and trying I haven't really had to deal with other pregnancy announcements. Now it seems like they are happening every other week around us. And of course the announcements do nothing but upset me and BJ just shrugs them off. I know it would be different if he didn't have the Little Guy. He'd be much more willing to try ANYTHING to get pregnant. And he'd be just as upset as me upon hearing these announcements.

I was just getting things back on track as far as my overall mood and then this happens. I'm completely bummed about it and now I will have a newborn right next to me next spring...when my baby(ies) should be turning a year old (from my failed IVF). Life is grand, no?

7 comments:

Fran said...

So sorry sweetie. Big hugs to you

Adventures in Baby Waiting said...

I'm sorry teejay. It isn't fair. You deserve it so much and it's just not fair. After all the time I have read your blog I never realized that maybe your dh isn't as gungho as you bc he already has a kid but you're right. I could see how that would be and I could understand that as being frustrating. I'm sorry. Does he know how you feel?

Kelly said...

Oh yuck. I'm so sorry.

Alex said...

This sucks - I'm sorry. Guys just don't get it how other people's pregnancies affect us, do they?

Don't give up yet...

Krystal said...

So sorry. I wish your DH would see that he needs to bring up stuff like that differently and in own time. I'm sure he'd rather be the one to tell you about it then finding out later when she's sporting a big baby bump, however I hope he finds a way to be more gentle about it. Men are so different then us, they say things and handle things differently.

I hope you start feeling better soon and hope things look up!

suchagoodegg said...

That fracking SUCKS. Ugh. :( My downstairs neighbor in my apt bldg is due in Sept and I can't help but shoot devil eyes at her. It's really, really, really hard. I'm sorry. And yeah, guys are totally CLUELESS about dropping these bombs on us. My husband has only SORTA learned that I will turn into a weepy mess if he chooses the wrong time to update me on yet another pregnancy in our building or friend circle. (Tho, to be fair, when is a good time?) Hang in there. xo

Lara (NoodleGirl) said...

Ugh, I'm so sorry TeeJay. It's so hard and cruel to be surrounded by pregnant women when you're TTCing, especially someone with whom you are friendly. It's not fair and I wish BJ was a little more aware of how it makes you feel. At least if you could vent together, it would give you some outlet.

{{{HUGS}}} I pray every day that it'll be you soon.