Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Welcome ICLW Readers

In the midst of the sadness that has gripped the blog world the last few days, it actually turns out to be ICLW. This community is all about leaving “virtual hugs” through comments and our dear friend Mo and her husband need that more than ever right now. I’m pretty sure she is not signed up so if you can click on this link and just leave her a kind word or two that would be great.

I haven’t participated in ICLW for a very long time. I was not in a very good place and I felt like I didn’t have much to share. Since we have stepped into the world of donor eggs I feel like I need to make some new connections. I would like to meet some new bloggers that I have this in common with. Don’t get me wrong, I love all the bloggy buddies that I have currently. I just need to connect with some women that have walked or are walking this same path.

My story is listed on the side bar to the right. It’s a bit long but not out of the ordinary in the IF world. I received a phone call from the donor coordinator yesterday that we have passed all of our tests with flying colors! I received my permanent password for the donor database. I was so excited to be able to move forward. When I logged in I was a bit let down to see that only 9 donors were on the list. The reason for this? We have chosen to go ahead with 1:3 donation and I guess the pool is much smaller for that program. Of the 9, BJ and I found 1 that we probably will go with. We were afraid to pick her last night because I know how quickly the pool can change. I also know that we can’t be too picky or we will never get this show on the road.

About the donor: She is 21, blonde, short, blue eyes. She is also adopted but claims to know the full medical history of her bio parents. She wants to be a hairstylist and open her own salon. She was a cheerleader in high school and she’s pretty. One recipient has already chosen her. They need 2 more in order to cycle. BJ and I weren’t sure what to do last night. I don’t want to jump in head first but I don’t want to delay because I’ve already seen 2 donors that I liked disappear in mere hours. I think we will need to talk about this again tonight and make a decision on whether to choose her or to move on.

If you have been in my shoes, how quickly were able to choose a donor? How selective were you? How did you feel after you chose your donor? One part of me wants to select her right now because there are some pretty serious issues that we have with the other 8 in the pool. However, there is a part of me that wants to wait a day or 2 to see if any new selections become available. This is such a huge decision and I just want to make the right choice. Wow, this just got very real and very heavy.


EC said...

I wish I had some advice, but I really don't know! I hate that kind of thing, where you don't know if it's better to make a move or to wait, and in this case, it's a big decision! I'm sure you'll make the right choice...I'm excited for you! Good luck!

Jem said...

We were in the other pool (sperm) looking for donors. In the end, we picked someone who we'd enjoy meeting at a dinner party, who's family sounded interesting. We pulled the trigger and haven't really looked back.

You won't make a bad decision.

Jem said...

Oops. I meant to type "whose"

Rebecca said...

After my WTF appt. tomorrow I'll hopefully be looking at DE as an option. I have my doubts that the appt. will even go that well.

I wish you the best of luck. You have the right to be choosy. This is your baby you are planning on creating.

someday-soon said...

Congratulations on passing your test with flying colors!!! What a huge leap forward =)

I'd follow your heart with the donor...if you feel like you should commit then do it. There is no "right" answer and if you have problems with all the other donors but this one looks good then maybe it's time to move. Does this donor have anything that concerns you?

Donor Diva said...

I had some of the very same feelings when I first started looking at the donor data base with my official password. We were also in a 3:1 program. What I did is I expanded my search options and found a few more donors. If you think she is the one then go for it. Some donors disappear fast and others it takes awhile.

It sounds like you are at the same clinic I cycles at almost 3 years ago now. I don't doubt our choice. We have the amazing child we were suppose to have. If you want to talk more about this just email me @ donordiva at gmail dot com.

Happy ICLW!