Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Welcome ICLW'ers!

Hello to any new readers and those just stopping by to say "hi". You can learn a little about my journey on my side bar over there but here is a quick recap:

I'm 34 years old and I've never been pregnant. I started trying with my first husband when I was 24. No luck and lots of tests and tears and frustration later, and I'm still trying with my new husband. We've been married just over 3 years and threw out the bcp a little over 4 years ago. We've been through 2 IUI's and an IVF. I have the elusive "unexplained infertility". My husband has a 9 year old boy from a previous relationship. I call him the Little Guy here. Although, he's not so little anymore. He's 4'8"! I'm only 5'2"...he'll be over my head before I know it. We have him at our house 50% of the time. Being a step-mom is tough and I have begun telling that story a little more here. It also, for me at least, is super tough when TTC a child.

I have bouts of depression. I work through them as best I can. My blog helps me with this in many ways. I try to stay positive and keep things light around here, but it doesn't always end up that way. Putting things down in writing helps me deal with the challenges that IF has brought into my life. I have really bad days and then I have some pretty good days. I try to point out (to myself, mainly) the good things that I have in my life and that usually translates into a "Happiness Is" I haven't done one in a while and I need to get back to it. Work is crazy and I don't blog much (or at all) from home.

Right now I'm in the middle of a cycle. I'm pretty sure I ovulated yesterday or late Monday. Although, with the ovary pain I was feeling yesterday evening and last night, I think it's a fair guess to say that it happened yesterday. That, and I did the opk again yesterday mid morning and I was still surging. BJ (my husband's name here) and I did the deed Monday night...our best timing (that I can tell) in a while. Fingers crossed that I can get this Miracle Baby conceived!

I was sitting at my desk yesterday afternoon when a co-worker went into my boss's office. He said to her "I got the green light from my wife to spread the news...we are 4 1/2 months pregnant!" He then went on to say that they waited extra long to tell people because he's 40 and she's 37 and they wanted to make sure that everything was normal. It is and so now he's telling folks. Lovely. And as if that weren't bad enough, many of my readers will remember the Honeymoon Baby from a set of neighbors that were "pleasantly surprised" by their pregnancy. Then I was hit with the people right next door to us expecting a March baby. They hadn't been using any b/c for over a year and now they are pregnant with their 3rd child. Drum roll please....another set of neighbors is having a baby. A couple that we met at the Little Guy's baseball game is pregnant. She has a boy that is 7 and a girl that is just over a year. He has an older son, mid-teens or so. And now they will have a baby of their own. BJ came in last night from washing his truck and told me that Jack, the neighbor, stopped by and gave him the news. Jack said (and this is what BJ said the last time), "there must be something in the water in this neighborhood." And then BJ said to him, "well, TeeJay sure hopes so." So now he knows that we can't get pregnant. You know those signs people put on their windows so that firefighters know you have a cat or a dog that they will need to save in case of a fire? Well, I think I'm going to get one that says "An Infertile Lives Here" and maybe people will quit sharing all their happy news. I'm just bitter because it was 2 announcements in one day. I am happy for the people, just sad for me and BJ.

Anyway, thanks for stopping by. If you are new to the blogging world, I highly recommend it. I have found a great group of women that share in my happiness and my misery and it has helped me so much. Reading blogs really lets me know that I am not alone and that there really are people out there that understand. I hope you have blessed day!


Mel. said...

So sorry you had such a rough day, one announcement is bad enough but two is just brutal.... Huge (((HUGS))) to you!

Crossed Fingers said...

It does seem like it's coming from all sides for you lately. Hopefully this timed BDing will result in your own happy news soon!

ICLW #115

Cortney said...

I just had to stop by and check out the blog with the great title (great minds think alike, huh?)

Yikes! Two announcements in one day--I'm sorry you had such a tough day!

Happy ICLW!

suchagoodegg said...

God, this sounds like what's going on in my office. EVERYONE is pregnant or just gave birth or has a toddler they talk about 24-7. Of course these are wonderful people and I am happy for them, but GOSH does it sting.

But YAY for ovulation and here's hoping-hoping-HOPING you're about to get your BFP. xoxo

~Katie said...

Your story sounds a lot like mine minus the step child. I am sure that is HARD! When we were TTC EVERYONE poopped up pregnant - even the pre-teens in the school district I work for. Hang in there. It sucks, but it's all worth it in the end. Love your blog! :)


keepingmyeyesonjesus said...

It's really hard to be confronted with pregnant neighbours like that! It also feels like I'm surrounded with them!

ICLW visitor # 105

April said...

I understand where you are coming from on TTC with a step-child. I'm there as well.

Good luck with this cycle. I hope it works!