What's Happening?

Hi everyone!

Sorry I haven’t been the best at updating lately.  It’s an election year and that means that we are really busy at work so I don’t get much free time.  I will catch you up on what’s been happening lately…bullet style!

·         We are getting ready for the Little Guy to start middle school.  Ack!  He’s not looking forward to his summer vacation ending but I’m hoping that he will start to get excited very soon.  We are going school supply shopping this weekend.  I LOVE shopping for school supplies.  I always have.  There’s just something about folders and notebooks and new pens that get me all excited!  I could spend hours in an office supply store shopping for these things.  He has an orientation day on the 20^th.  They will ride the bus to school and take the tour of their classes and probably get lists of more supplies that are needed and then be home before 12:00.  School actually starts on the 21^st.  We never had an orientation day.  We just had to show up and hope for the best the first day.  No, I didn’t walk to school barefoot in the snow uphill both ways.

·         We were going to go the beach for a few days next week but given my penchant for heat/sun induced headaches we are skipping it.  I’m sad because I really need to get away for a few days but there’s not much to do indoors at the beach.  We have decided to take the LG away in early October to an indoor waterpark for a couple of days. We looked into it for next week but the prices were way over our budget for a 2 night stay so we will go in October when it’s about half the cost.  He was ok with this as he’s never been to the indoor waterpark before.  Score!

·         More people at work are learning about the pregnancy.  I’ve told a couple more people and I think word will start to spread now on its own.  BJ asked me how in the world I can keep it in.  I don’t really know the answer to that.  Maybe it’s the fear or maybe it’s because I like having this wonderful little secret all to myself.  Once people know, the questions and the advice start flying around and I’d rather not be bombarded with co-workers’ advice.  The important people have been told by me and that is what matters.  The others can learn through the grapevine or when they see the belly.

·         I have been bad about keeping up with my beautiful flower garden.  It’s been so hot this summer that going outside has been nearly impossible.  Even most evenings are still pretty warm.  I’m usually out there every weekend trimming roses, cutting back lilies and pulling weeds.  The migraines I get from the heat/sun have won out over my quest for the best looking yard in the neighborhood.  I’m hoping for some cooler weather this weekend so that I can trim things up a bit.

·         BJ finally went back to the doctor about the pains he gets in his side that travel around to his back.  They took some x-rays and noticed that the base of his spine is curving the wrong way.  The doctor wants him to go to physical therapy and try some exercises to strengthen his back to see if that alleviates some of the pain.  His first session was yesterday.  Of course it felt great while he was there and when he left but then later he was hurting pretty badly.  I told him that he probably just worked some muscles that he hasn’t worked before and it will get better.  I hope so as I hate to see him in pain.

·         We are supposed to start clearing things out of the basement this weekend so that BJ has room to start working on finishing it.  (because we’re having a baby!)  I have some things set aside to take to the thrift store but we have quite a bit of stuff to sort through to see what else we can get out of there.  I’m a little anxious to get going on this because I know that once school starts the time will start flying by and then it will be the holidays and oh my gosh the baby will be here shortly after that (hopefully).

There’s much more to write about but for now that is about all I have time for.  I hope you all have a great weekend and I’ll talk at ya later!  (one of my Grandmother’s sayings).  Oh, and I put up a ticker…not sure how I feel about it yet.  Does it make me seem too arrogant or confident?  I’m not sure these feelings will ever go away.  I guess I can thank IF for making me worried about a ticker, right?  *sigh*.

Getting Things Done

My long-time readers will remember that we bought a house back in December of 2009.  This house has 4 bedrooms…a master, the Little Guy’s bedroom, a play/game room for the LG and a spare bedroom that has been turned in to my scrapping room.  This 4^th bedroom was intended to be a nursery and hopefully that is exactly what it will be in a few months.

We have told the LG since we moved in that we were going to fix up his play room.  We were going to get him a new TV, paint, hang up a bunch of sports stuff and make it a really cool room.  Well, we have dragged our feet.  It’s not cheap to buy a new TV and TV stand so we have been procrastinating.  We have also had a hard time finding a TV stand that we like and that will hold the video games and consoles in a neat and orderly fashion.

I’m now pregnant and BJ is anxious (to say the least) to get started on the basement so that we can move my scrapping things down there and turn the room into the nursery.  I told him that there is no way we are starting on the nursery until we complete the LG’s playroom.  I suggested doing it all at once on a weekend that we didn’t have him so that he could see it completed on his first day back at our house.  BJ agreed and we set our plan in motion.  I already had bought quite a few things to hang up in the room over the last couple of years so we were set there.  We bought a TV and actually found a really cheap but perfect TV stand and hid them in the basement.  BJ bought the paint (the same gray we painted our bedroom and a bright orange that the LG had picked out for an accent wall) and we were set.  One Friday after work BJ began taping off the trim and ceiling and we moved everything out of the room and I did almost all the cutting in.  It was a late night for us.  The next morning I got up early and finished cutting in while BJ drank his coffee and then he joined me.  He taped off the accent wall and we starting painting.  We worked all day and into the evening but we got the room painted with 2 coats and it looked great!

Sunday was spent adding all the decorating touches…sticking on the wall decals, hanging the sports pictures, pinning the Ovechkin jersey to the wall, hooking up the TV, hanging the pictures of the LG playing sports, setting his trophies out and making sure everything looked awesome.  The room was missing something so we headed to kmart to see if we could find a sports clock.  No luck, but we found a great sports area rug that we snatched up and added to the room for a final touch.  There are still a few bare spots on one of the walls so we need to get some Orioles things and maybe a few more Redskins items and then we will be 100% finished.  The room looks so great.  I don’t think I’ve ever been so proud of us and how we worked together to make it perfect for the LG.

Monday came and BJ told the LG that we had a surprise for him in his room so he wasn’t allowed to go in there to play.  As soon as I got home from work we all headed upstairs and we did the big reveal.  He was so happy.  He really likes his room and I’m so glad.  I hope that he can hold onto this memory and really appreciate all that we did for him.  And although he probably wouldn’t have said anything to us if we had done the nursery first, I think there would have been an underlying resentment there.  And who could have blamed him, you know?  So now he knows for sure that he is just as important as the new baby and that we worked just as hard for him as we will on the nursery.

I’ll eventually post pictures of the room and pictures of the rest of the house because we have done some work over the last couple of years and I promised pictures a long time ago.

Getting Things Accomplished

BJ and I decided to take Friday off from work. We actually decided to do it before we saw the weather report. After we saw the weather report we were very excited to have off on Friday. The forecast was for sunny skies and 80-85!! The actual weekend was scheduled to be rainy and cool and just blah. We knew we wanted to get out in the yard and get some plants in the ground and cut the grass and fertilize and change the oil in the mower...all good Spring-time activities.


We dropped the LG off at school and ran our errands of getting a new weed trimmer, plants, mulch and fertilizer. As soon as we got home we started working. We worked outside for 5 hours, people. It was great because even though we were working hard we barely broke a sweat...no humidity this early in the season!

I did most of the labor work while BJ rode around on his mower but he did help me install the new edging around the mailbox. I planted 4 pansies, 9 petunias and 3 baby daffodils. I also raked up our mulch and spread new mulch down in both of our little gardens. We were beat at the end of the day. If you aren’t familiar with our region of the US, we do not really have dirt. We have clay. Digging holes in clay is a pain in the butt. It’s wet (since it doesn’t drain well) and heavy and sticky and clumpy. I know I could sell some of it to art studios so they could make great sculptures.

It felt so good to get all of that done before the nasty weather came in. When we woke up Saturday morning we were both really sore. Remember when I said that digging was a pain in the butt? I meant that literally. My glute muscles were so sore...oh my gosh! It hurt to walk and to sit. I’m sure all the squatting up and down helped to wear these muscles out, too. BJ said that maybe I needed to start doing some lunges if that little bit of work wore my butt out. Hmph. I’ll show him some lunges.

We didn’t do much on Saturday but on Sunday we hung up all of the LG’s 8x10 school pictures from Kindergarten to this year and 4 of his sports pictures in the office. It looks like the office of a family now and not just a room in a house. I’m so proud of us for finally getting that done. Now I just need to make a collage of family and wedding photos for the other wall and that room will be complete. Whew!

We are getting our consent forms signed and notarized this evening, too. I’m excited to have those completed forms in hand. I had to move my appointment with Dr. M up because I have to meet with him before I go in for my Lupron evaluation. The only thing they have available is this Wednesday at 2:00. I’ll have to use a half day of sick leave to make this appointment. I’m excited, though, so it’s not that big of a deal. And when I looked over the calendar I noted that I will begin Lupron injections on April 6! That’s only 11 days away!! Looking at it like that makes moving the ER much more bearable. AND my meds are supposed to be delivered today! I can’t wait to get that box.

So things are getting accomplished in TeeJay-land. Little by little and bit by bit we are achieving success. Let’s hope it carries over in this whole baby makin’ process.

The Big Day

The big day is not my wedding day or anything like that...it’s the day I will sit down with my doctor and discuss using donor eggs to expand our family. It’s either going to be a very GOOD big day or a very BAD big day. I’m so nervous. I don’t have a good feeling. The last time I sat down with him he told me that I was not eligible for the shared risk IVF. He knew then that I had bad eggs but didn’t tell me. I was too great a risk for them to take. So I sucked it up and took one last shot at IVF. I knew it would work and it did. It just didn’t last. I’m so rattled right now and I think that it’s because there is so much riding on this.


I would think that I’m the perfect candidate for donor eggs and that there should be no reason for them to deny us the shared risk program. He has always told me how great and beautiful my uterus is. He has never mentioned any strange blood disorders or immune issues...but maybe they never tested for them. I just have a feeling that I’m going to be disappointed after tomorrow’s appointment.

I don’t even know what the appointment will entail. I’m hoping to get hooked up with a donor coordinator tomorrow and get a password and start looking. I know there’s going to be lots of papers to fill out and legal jargon to sift through. I hope that we can start the process right away. BJ is so wonderful, he took the day off in case we need to sit there for a while. He said he’d rather do that than keep watching the clock and getting impatient knowing that he has things to do. I hope we are sitting there for a while. I want to start getting everything in order. I imagine there will be blood work and probably another SA (he’ll be thrilled). I plan on putting in the paperwork for my 401k loan as soon as we get the all clear from the financial lady that we can do the shared risk program. Hopefully we are allowed to enter that program.

I can’t tell you ladies how much it means to me to have you rooting for us and cheering us on and supporting us. I need ALL of it right now. I feel like I could throw up with anticipation. In less than 24 hours I will know what path we are on....heading toward another shot (or 6) or hitting a steel barrier.

In other news....I will not be one of those lucky ladies to post on here about a surprise BFP just as we make the decision for DE. Yesterday was CD1. Meaning that tomorrow would be a really good time for some blood work and for starting BCP’s in preparation. Fingers and toes and everything else crossed.

We painted the office Saturday. This reminds me that I have totally abandoned posting pictures of our house and the few changes we have made since we moved in. I’ll have to get back to that. As we were painting and doubting our ability and criticizing every little mistake we made, I told BJ that hopefully it was a practice run in case we get to paint a nursery. It seems crazy to think that it might happen...but it might, right? *sigh*

I’m just a worrier at heart, I guess. I was so pumped up the last time I went in there for an appointment and I guess I don’t want to do that to myself again. I probably will not update until Wednesday because if by chance I come to work I will be arriving late and playing catch up all day and if I don’t come in then I will be hanging with BJ for the day.

It’s go time.

Improving the Home

I've gained some new readers in the passed year so I'm going to recap just a bit on our house.  BJ and I were able to sell my house last Summer and have a house built.  If you've never gone through the process, it's not as easy as it seems.  There are 1,000 choices to make before they even break ground.  Builders also make their money off of upgrades and options.  We were pretty smart about what we chose to upgrade, I think.  There are some things that we wished we had known because we would have done them differently but how much can you know before you live in a house?  And not only that, but the house we came from was so...ordinary, that everything we picked was like a luxury to us.  Anyway, certain things were not upgraded because we knew we could do it cheaper (and probably better) on our own or with the help of BJ's contractors from work.  How much work could there be in a new home you may ask?  See this post to get an idea of our plans.

We bought our hardware for our cabinets months ago.  BJ finally installed everything about a month ago.  We had our kitchen floor and backsplash installed in June.  I have been waiting since then for BJ to put the shoe molding up.  He finally brought some home Thursday.  We actually stained and painted all of it yesterday!  I will have a complete kitchen by this weekend (hopefully!).  I can't tell you how excited I am.  I will be able to take pictures and show all of you the transformation from the beginning.  I have been promising pictures for a very long time but I refused to post any until it was done.  There will be painting and more decorating along the way, but once the shoe molding gets put up, it's done for the foreseeable future in my opinion.

As we were walking through Lowe's, we casually strolled down the curtain aisle.  I need some sheer curtains for the office.  Of course, they didn't have any that were long enough.  However, we did stumble upon some red and black curtains that we grabbed for the Little Guy's room.  AND, we even put them up yesterday!  I ironed them and everything.  Aren't you proud of us?  I sure am.  It was a feat to buy them and put them up all in the same weekend.  Go us!

We still have a quite a few projects to complete but we are on our way.  I'm hoping to have my wood floors installed by Christmas but I'm not holding my breath.  Neither BJ nor I are getting a bonus this holiday season so the floors will probably wait until the Spring.  I absolutely hate our carpet.  It's so cheap and such low quality.  I can't believe they actually put it in people's brand new homes.  We haven't even lived there a year yet and we don't wear our shoes on the carpet and it's already smooshed down and looks like we've lived there 5 years.  The only time it looks decent is when I first vacuum it.  It will be fine until it can be replaced.  That is the only thing that keeps me sane about it...it will be replaced and soon.

We went looking for a pre-lit Christmas tree Saturday.  We looked at 3 places and finally found one that we liked.  It was the right height, width and price.  It only comes in clear lights.  Drats.  I like multi-colored lights on my tree.  So it's back to the drawing board.  I know it may seem crazy to be looking for a tree right now, but we only have until Thanksgiving weekend to find one.  The house gets decorated over the long weekend.  And you know what?  I'm really looking forward to it.  I was in a major funk last year but I'm ready to make my house pretty.  We bought a few things and have an idea of more things we'd like to get so we are on a bit of a roll right now.  I even made my first QVC purchase of the season last night!  I can't wait for it to come in the mail.  It's a wired strand of lights and it will have many uses...I bought 2 and I'm hoping that's enough.  :-)  Bring on the Christmas cheer!

Impulse Shopping at its Best

We went to the mall Saturday to get the Little Guy some school shoes. For any newbies out there, I'm a step mom to a 9-year old little boy. We walked the mall for 2 hours looking for shoes and ended up getting a pair in the first store we looked. I also found a curtain rod for my new curtains. It's not as cool as the one in the living room, but I like it and it was on sale. And then of course the store is having a door buster sale so we decided to look at some jeans for the Little Guy. We got 2 pair for $25.00 and then got an additional percentage off! Then he saw a shirt that he HAD to have. It was on sale for 40% off so of course BJ caved and let him get it. Then BJ saw a pair of shorts that he liked that were marked down from $26 to $9.99...and we got the additional percentage off. The cashier scanned a coupon for us that saved us another $15.00! So with all the little things we picked up....curtain rod, jeans, shirt and shorts...we only spent $78! I so could have looked at the women's clothes but decided that we had spent enough money. At the bottom of the receipt, it said we saved $96! I was delighted. Plus, the Little Guy has new shoes and an outfit for the first day of school so he is pleased as well. Going in for shoes and coming out with all of that lets me know that the stores are doing their job of getting us to buy more than we came in for.

BJ put my curtains up and I love them. I had to borrow a steamer from our neighbor to get the creases out and I love them even more now. I didn't take any pictures because I would love to get a dining room table very soon and call it a complete room for now...until I paint and we get wood floors.

Yesterday we actually went looking for a dining table at a local store. They had 1 table set that we liked it was over $2,000 and only came with 4 chairs. Way over priced and so we moved along. BJ wanted to hit the office supply store and look for a new calendar for work. So we walked through and came upon the desks. We decided to order a desk for our office! It's a (fake) cherry finish and it's U shaped and has a hutch. A great deal at $400 considering you can't touch a complete set like that at the furniture stores for that cheap. So we went in for a calendar and came out with a desk on order. :-) Impulse shoppers for sure. The desk should be delivered the day after Labor Day. It will look so much better in there than the old desk I have. I have not unpacked the office because I wanted a new desk and I thought I'd be looking at those boxes for a year. Glad that is over. Plus, with a finish like that we can get a book case or a file cabinet to match.

In cycle news....I'm pretty sure I'm ovulating this morning. I tested so many times on Saturday and I finally got a positive read out at 10:45pm. BJ wanted to have some fun so we did even though I knew we were a little early. I tested yesterday morning and still had the positive so I was hoping to feel ovulation yesterday afternoon (as would be typical for my body) but I didn't. We skipped last night so I have to hope that the swimmers that got up there at 11:30 Saturday night are still hanging out. It's as close as we have come in a while so I'm going to stay positive about things. Even though last night would have been better. My stupid body is always trying to foil things. I usually (before IVF and all that jazz) ovulate on CD13 and here it is CD14. Go figure.

Long Story, Short

Ok, so I don't think I've ever told a long story in a short manner but that is usually my intent. I will do my best here.

Work has been completely insane this week. I had that conference to prep for and it took place Tuesday morning. I had to get up at 4:45am to make it downtown in time to get what I needed and head over to the convention center for an arrival time of 7:00am. Long day to say the least. It went well and everyone was pleased with the work we did. Our executive council meeting was set to start Wednesday. It's a 2-day meeting and the days are broken down by topic. My boss wanted to hand out materials for her portion on Thursday morning. No big deal...she told me that I would be making 60 packets. I can handle that. I come in Wednesday fully prepared for the task at hand. Everything comes to a screeching halt when I find out that I actually have to make 125 packets! Holy sh!t! That changes things...big time. Plus, 2 documents have to be in color. Which means making a last minute request to our printing department (which they love by the way) to get these copies made for me. The materials changed, and I kid you not, at least 5 times during the day. So I come to the realization that I will be staying late to get them done. Which I do. However, the packets have not been approved by our president yet. There could be changes. The meeting starts at 9:00am on Thursday and if I have to make changes to 125 packets then I will, again, have to come in super early. So I do. I get up at 5:15am yesterday and drag my ass in here only to find out that everything is fine. Which is good. However I still have to get them over to the meeting place. Everything went fine and I'm so glad it's over. These couple of days of pandemonium and long days have really taken a toll on me. Not to mention that I drove in yesterday to save some time and because we had some really wicked storms in the afternoon I sat in traffic for an hour longer than I should have. It took me over 2 hours to get home. I am spent.

Today will be a catching up day from everything that has been piling up on my desk this week. And that is fine with me.

In cycle news...I'm on CD23, 13DPO. My boobs are hurting, and I'm constantly checking them. I'm on the look out for any spotting. Since I have been feeling pms-y for about a week now, I can't judge my moods. I'm not temping so I don't have that bit of info either. All I have is sore boobs. I'll take it. That means that my body is doing what it should right now.

I haven't been a very good commenter lately and I apologize for that. I've been feeling pretty stressed at work and they limit what I can do on here so it's hard to comment as much as I want to. I plan to get better. But I also plan to get pregnant. :-) Just kidding, I will get better. Rest assured though, I am reading and following along with all of you. Those are the times of my day that I enjoy...when I can read a blog entry or two and find out how all of you are doing.

No plans for the weekend, really. We have the Little Guy but he'll be with his mom tomorrow afternoon and evening for a b-day party...for her 40-year-old friend. Don't ask me why he needs to be there for that but whatever. I'll be cleaning house for sure. Having 2 cats has multiplied our need to vacuum and dust more regularly. I actually have some house news and some good Gizmo stories but they will have to wait. This is entirely too long and pretty boring already.

Oh what the hell....we found some shades that we really like for the kitchen bump out sidelights and for our bathroom. Mind you, BJ put blinds up in our bathroom just a few days after we moved in. I hate them. They are so plain and white and just feel cold to me. We found some at Lowe's that I think will be wonderful! We haven't ordered them yet as they are very expensive to say the least. We are waiting for my bonus check to come in (next Friday!) before we spend that kind of money. The kitchen ones are just white but they are the top down/bottom up kind. That way we can put the top down to let in the light but or neighbors won't be able to see us through the bottom! Clarification....this will help broaden our horizons to where we can have "fun" time! The bathroom shades are called day and night. The top half (that can come all the way down) are brown with a design on the fabric and then the bottom half (that can go all the way up) are an off white linen type of material. My plan is to pull the brown part about 1/3 of the way down the window to give the area some color (the bathroom colors are blue and chocolate brown) and then leave the off white part down to let the light in (or raise them if I want to see out). They are extra expensive because we had to have them custom sized and they charge extra for cordless, which we got for the kitchen windows. The back door is a glass door and I recently got one of those curtains that just covers the glass and bunches in the middle so I think everything will match well. And I know I still owe you pictures of my finished kitchen. If BJ would ever put the handles on and put the shoe molding back, I could take pictures. I refuse to do so until it's completely done. So you will just have to suffer without seeing it done the same way I am. :-)

Anyway, sorry for the long post...see, I might be wordy but I'm not an exaggerator. I warned you that I can't tell a long story, short. Have a great weekend everyone!

It Doesn't Get Easier

As hard as I may try, it doesn't get any easier to go on month after month and keep up the faith and the hope. It's hard for so many reasons but mainly because I know the outcome. It's hard to get passed the fact that I've been trying to get pregnant for over 9 years. And in those 9 years I've had regular periods, ewcm, temperature spikes. I know that my body is doing what it is supposed to be doing. Well, except for the not getting pregnant part. The only explanations are either bad eggs, crazy unknown hormone issues or a lining issue. Knowing that doesn't make things easier.

As many of my regular readers know, we moved into a new house in a new development last December. Other than the people right next to us, no one on the cul de sac has children. It's odd because you would think that a cul de sac would be ripe for families and those planning on families. That's why we picked a lot there. The first people to live on the cul de sac are older than us and I've only spoken to the husband, Paul once or twice. I have waved to the wife, April as she walked her dogs. There are more dogs in our circle of houses than kids, funny, I just realized that. Anyway, Paul and April just got married in March. One of them has a son that goes to college. And when I say goes, I mean that he lives at college. BJ was watering the lawn yesterday and talking to the lady right next door to us, Kim. Paul came by with the dogs. Kim asked why she/we haven't seen April out and about lately like we used to. I was inside and BJ tells me all of this when he comes in. Paul's answer...."April's pregnant. It's not something we planned for right now...not that we weren't going to try. But we weren't expecting it this soon. She's due in December so it's basically a honeymoon baby. She's been really sick and having a very hard time of things lately." And I said to BJ, "of course she's pregnant...I mean they just got married in March, right??" And then I told him that it never gets easier to hear these announcements. He agreed with me. I wish he wouldn't have told me. I wish that I would have just seen her with a belly down the road. Oh well.

And to make matters worse...Kim knows of BJ's and my struggles with IF. Not all the nitty gritty but I told her that we tried and failed with IUI's and an IVF. So when she stops by to get her son (he didn't want to walk with her so he hung out with us) she blurts out Paul and April's news. As if my own husband weren't going to tell me, she felt the need to let me know. How f'ing sweet of her.

In cycle news....I'm not temping this month. Things haven't gotten off to a good start so I threw it out the window for this cycle. I had some ewcm yesterday, which is odd because it was only CD7 so I decided to test with an opk today. It was negative. Ovulation should occur this weekend....of course we have the Little Guy so who knows what will happen in our house as far as sexy time goes. I'm going to try and get some tonight (sounds very frat boy, doesn't it) so at least if it happens early, I'll be covered.

I will post about our new kitten, Gizmo, either tomorrow or early next week. He is one of the reasons my temping is not happening...he likes to keep me awake at night.

I will try and return to my normal blogging pattern very soon. I'm just still not feeling quite like myself. I appreciate each and every one of your comments and it's comforting to know that you are out there. Ya'll are great.

Why I've Been Absent...

Howdy, folks! I have so much to say and I will try to condense it as much as possible. I started this post last Thursday and wrote all of one sentence and then had to close down and have not been able to start again until now.


1 - Work was so busy last week. We flew 30 people in for a meeting that lasted from Friday until Sunday. I didn't have to be there but I was involved in most of the logistics of the meeting...the catering, the materials, the a/v etc. It was a lot to deal with and we were short handed on the support staff side of things.


2 - We (the Little Guy and I) went to the beach Friday with my SIL and her 3 kids. Everything was fine until we were leaving and my SIL had a major asthma attack right on the beach. Luckily there was a young man that called up to the park office to get help. They had to come get her on the John Deere Gator and take her back up (we walked down a pretty long hill to get to the water). I was in charge of all the kids and all the stuff we had brought. Her oldest son also has asthma and she was worried that he'd have an attack walking up the hill in the heat so the Gator guy came and grabbed him and was nice enough to take our cart full of stuff so that we could just concentrate on walking up. She's ok but she sure scared me. She was in the hospital earlier this year for 10 or 11 days with asthma complications so the last thing we need is her to have a relapse.


3 - Our new kitchen floor and backsplash was installed Friday. The guys arrived about 9:00am and worked their butts off until almost 9:00pm. They ran out of grout so BJ has to finish a portion of the backsplash himself. We can't put the stove back until it's done. It looks great and once BJ finishes that and puts the hardware on the cabinets I will post pictures of before and after. I love the floor and the glass tile backsplash. We weren't there all weekend so not having a stove didn't affect us until last night. Tonight we will grill salmon and steam asparagus in my steamer.


4 - We weren't home because we were offered a "free vacation" at Massanutten for 3 days and 2 nights. It's one of those time share offers where you have to sit through their sales pitch and you get to stay for free. We left Saturday morning and got back yesterday afternoon. We enjoyed ourselves. We rode go-karts, played putt-putt, went to the indoor/outdoor water park, played at the arcades, played ping pong (it was the Little Guy's first time playing), played a golf simulator, had some decent food and just enjoyed being away from home. They offered a spectacular deal but we knew going in that we weren't going to buy anything. We want to be as debt free as possible until we apply for financing for our pool.


5 - I took my OPK's with me as I was certain that I would get a positive reading while we were gone. We stayed at a 1 bedroom condo so I thought for sure that we would be able to get some BD'ing in. I tested negative Saturday and that's the night that BJ was ready to go, of course. So we tried. And we failed. He was certain that the Little Guy could hear us even though the door was shut and our TV was on. He was really close a couple of times but just lost his concentration. Just my luck. And it's also just my luck that I got my positive reading Sunday afternoon. I knew better that to even try to get anything out of him again. *sigh* I'm pretty sure I ovulated yesterday morning because I felt some twinges on my right ovary. My temp was up slightly this morning so I'm pretty convinced that it was yesterday. However, we were able to get some action in last night so just in case that little egg came out later than I thought, we might still have a small chance. I'll take a small chance over no chance at all.


6 - On our trip I was in my bathing suit almost all day on Sunday. I scoped out my "area" to see how the waxing was holding up. I think I have 12 hairs in all that have grown back and might (I stress might) be long enough to be waxed again. It's been over 3 weeks since I was waxed and I'm loving it.

7 - As you can imagine, I have a lot of blog reading to do. I haven't read anything since Wednesday or Thursday so I apologize for the lack of comments. I'll get back into the swing of things shortly. Keep a look out on some of your older posts for my 2 cents!

Weekend Recap

I've been so busy at work that I haven't had time to post anything and I hate it when that happens. I'll give everyone a quick run down of the last week and then get in to my strange cycle that I'm experiencing.

- We had the Little Guy Friday night so I drove to work that day in order to get home and chill out with my guys a little earlier than usual. As soon as I come in the house BJ's phone rings. It's the neighbor at the bottom of the hill inviting us to dinner at the Japanese Steakhouse. I didn't want to go because it's very expensive (basically $21 a person) and I had JUST WALKED IN THE DOOR. But we went. Never mind the fact that I paid our mortgage that day and had planned on getting a pedicure that weekend. Dinner was fine and we had a good chef and the food was good, but we spent $80 with tip! For 3 people to eat Chinese food basically. Unreal. No pedi for me so now I am way over due and have to wait until next pay day (tomorrow).

- We had workers at the house Saturday morning and now I have a huge hole in my dining room wall. I really need to post about this house situation but I hate to complain about something I love so much.

- We took the Little Guy shoe shopping after the workers left. Tell me, how many 8 year olds get to decide what shoes they will and won't wear? This is one of those step-parenting moments where I wish I were the mother because he would wear whatever shoe fit and I bought for him, within reason of course. BJ let him call the shots....he wants Nike 6.0's like all his other friends. Whatever. I gave up. We don't live near a mall and all the 6.0's that we found weren't the right color. Give me a break. I was so done with this excursion and we were only looking for a little over an hour.

- BJ's sister and her family came over Saturday evening. We grilled some yummy pork chops and some bbq chicken legs and I made macaroni salad. The kids played and decided to go play on the new construction dirt outside. SIL and I went for a walk after dinner, leaving the boys (our husbands) to babysit the kids. When we got back, the kids were a muddy mess and had to change their clothes before touching anything in my house. Then the neighbors we had dinner with Friday night came over and we all chatted for a while. They didn't leave until 11:00. I can't believe we kept the kids up that late. At least it's not an every day thing.

- We had to give the Little Guy back to his mom early on Sunday because she wanted to take him camping. We had been invited to a cookout and crab feast at a friend's house so we headed there. It was really hot outside but we couldn't tell. Their yard is right on the river bank and shaded by 3 big trees. It was perfect...warm with a breeze. We saw quite a few people from our old neighborhood and it was really good to get caught up with everyone and hear all the good (and not so good) gossip. After we left there and since it was early, we decided to hang out with the bottom of the hill neighbors for a little while. I think we were just avoiding going home because the Little Guy wasn't there. We didn't get home until 12:00 midnight. A very long day indeed.

- Needless to say, we vegged on Monday. It was so nice to just sit home. We didn't drive anywhere. We even ate all 3 meals at home. :-) It was so sunny that I decided to lather up with some sunscreen and lay out on the deck for a little while. BJ took his shirt off and sat in a chair and we listened to the birds and the radio and just chilled out. It was great. We needed that day after the busy weekend we had.

I'm on CD17 today. FF has yet to tell me if/when I ovulated. I had a high temp on CD9 for some reason and I think it threw my whole chart off. However, this morning I had a pre-ovulation temp of 97.9. I'm pretty sure I felt ovary pinching on Monday, which is good because we did some BD'ing Sunday night. But Monday was CD14 and that's a little late for me. So once again I have no idea what my body is doing. We BD'd on CD8, 10, 13 and 16....I'm hoping we covered our bases. I actually saw a tiny bit of ewcm on CD13 so I'm wondering if I did, indeed, ovulate on Monday? I'm going to wait to see what my temp is tomorrow morning before I manually override my chart info on what I felt. I will definitely be ordering my opk's in the next few days. I can't keep guessing about when I ovulate. This baby makin' stuff is enough to drive a woman insane.

Weekend Recap

I did the ICLW post yesterday so today I thought I'd catch everyone up on our weekend. Because I know you are dying to hear about what we did and what we ate and all that good stuff. :-)

BJ and I both took Friday off because our shed was to be delivered. We wanted to clean out the garage so that I can park in there on a more permanent basis and just organize the garage because we've never had one and now we do and we want it to look nice. How's that for a run on sentence? While we were waiting for the shed (and the phone repair guy...that's another story to add to the list of stories about the house) I ran a couple of errands. BJ finished changing the lights in the bathroom and they look great. We need to fill the holes from the old lights but other than that, I love them. He did some odd jobs around the house and I decided to dig up my azaleas and move them to the side of the house. I'm not much on azaleas so I wanted them out of my sight but didn't want to throw them away. I measured 3 holes using BJ's measuring tape and started digging. And I dug...and I dug...and I dug. We must have the worst soil in America. It's mostly clay and of course it's full of rocks because it's a new home site. Not ideal for digging and I hope everything we planted doesn't die in the clay. Anyway, after I dug my carefully measured holes (I'm anal about symmetry) I dug up the azaleas and carried them over. The base was too big for the holes I dug. Just my luck. So I had to enlarge the holes which threw off my symmetry but I eventually got them in the ground. I noticed my arms were a little itchy and I looked down to find red dots all over. Great...I'm apparently sensitive to azaleas the same way I am to Christmas trees. No more moving them or at least I'll be wearing long sleeves. I now have 3 big holes in the front landscaping to fill.

The shed came (finally) and we love it. It's on the opposite side of the yard due to the ground not being quite level but it looks great. It's darker than we thought but we still like it. We got it to match the house...gray siding with black shutters. We were so worn out from the yard work and other things that we didn't put anything in it yet. We had baseball Saturday morning and then we went to a seafood restaurant on the water and ate a dozen crabs. So yummy...it was our first crab lunch this season. After we ate we went to the local nursery to find some stuff to fill the holes of the missing azaleas. I bought a knock out rose bush and two spireas (sp?) and we bought 2 zinnias and two petunias to go in between the spider plants. I got everything in the ground and then I cleaned the house a little and then it was chill out time. We went down to the neighbors and had a couple cocktails. Sunday morning was all about getting ready for the Pampered Chef party. The party went great and I can't wait to get the stuff I ordered. More people than I expected showed up and it proved to me (BJ) that we really need to get 2 more chairs for the kitchen table and we need to pick out a dining table. But it was nice to have everyone over. I made fruit dip and bought some berries and my guests (and their kids) tore it up and kept raving about it. Once they heard the recipe (lite cool whip and blueberry yogurt) they loved it even more because of how simple it is to make.

Anyway, that was my weekend. I had 3 days off but I feel like I worked the whole time. I'm very happy with the new landscaping and I can actually park in my garage. Plus, I hosted a party for the first time! Yay!

Oh, and since this is a TTC blog....I'm on CD8 right now with no signs of fertility yet. I'm hoping that means I'll ovulate a little closer to mid-cycle this time. We shall see. And thank you to all the ICLW commentors! I love learning about people and following their journeys.

Thanks for the B-Day Gift, AF/Other Stuff

As you can probably guess from my title, AF showed her bitchy face on Tuesday. That means that I had a 25 day cycle. Another "off" month. I guess the norm for me now is just whatever the hell my body wants to do. Stupid body. And stupid AF for showing up on my shopping excursion on my birthday of all days. But it is what it is, right? I was actually pretty hopeful this month because I wanted that big surprise moment when I realized that we weren't paying attention to anything this month and this is THE month that it happened...right at my birthday and our anniversary (today). But of course, this month is no different than any of the other months over the last 9 years. *sigh* The plan is to temp this cycle and get back on track with that. I forgot to order my opk's so I'll just be temping this time around. At least I'll be able to pin point ovulation better.

I did some shopping for the house on Tuesday and spent more money than I should have but I actually bought most things on a pretty good sale. I'm having my pampered chef party on Sunday and I needed to make the house look more "homey" as I have a lot of blank walls right now. I bought a really cool clock for over the fireplace and some pretty things for the mantle. It still needs more, but it's a good start. I also got some pictures to hang in the bathroom and some candle stands and candles for around the big tub. I feel pretty good about my purchases. I will post some pictures of the rooms before and after once we get everything together. My parents have been bugging me for pictures because all they have seen are the empty rooms right before we moved in. There's not much to look at until we decorate and I've been slow to get that done. Partially because of money and partially because of the time it takes to pick things out. Mostly because I get overwhelmed at the stores and don't have any confidence in my taste or my ability to pull a room together.

I have been searching for a new bedspread set for our bedroom for months. I found one that I really like. I was going to buy it because I thought it was on sale but then I couldn't find it on the floor. I asked the sales lady about it and she went to look in the back. Can you believe my luck? They were out of it. Then she tells me that it's going to go on sale Thursday or Friday...for 1/2 off! So I will be taking a walk tomorrow to the store downtown to see if they have it in stock. If not, BJ will be making a trip (he doesn't know this yet) to a mall near his job site to get it for us (ME). I can't wait to get it. The only problem is that part of it is white and that is the area that my beloved kitty lays. I will have to figure out a way to make sure she doesn't dirty the pretty white. I was thinking of getting a white sheet and laying it down each morning and hopefully she'll actually lay ON the sheet and not NEXT to it. Then, if I know people are coming over I can pick the sheet up and they will see only a clean white bedspread. Once I get this bed set I can finish decorating my bedroom. I had originally wanted to do chocolate brown and spa blue (like my master bath) but once I saw this set, I had to have it. I would tell you to look it up online at Macy's (it's the Olivia set) but the colors do not look anything like the online picture. I will post some pictures once the room comes together.

Our shed is getting delivered tomorrow morning. YAY! The 4-wheelers and the lawn mower will be gone and we can actually organize the garage! BJ and I are taking off together to get things straight before the weekend hits and we get tied up with baseball and house cleaning for the party on Sunday. The plan is to do some yard work, too. I want to move the azaleas the builder planted and put something with more color out front. We'll see how far we get.

It's our anniversary today. We've been married for 3 years. We have the Little Guy tonight so we'll be grilling at home. Today is the day we became a family. Not exactly the family I had envisioned, but a family nonetheless. We went out to eat at Outback for my b-day so we decided to eat at home tonight in the interest of trying to save money...since I spent so much on Tuesday. :-)

I'm trying not to dwell on the failure of this cycle. It's not easy when I'm reminded all the time that I'm not a mother. I was watching Cougar Town last week and almost broke out into tears. The tears welled up but they never spilled over. If you watch the show, you'll understand why. Jules' son graduated high school. He was selected to give a speech at the ceremony. The speech was mostly about how great his dad is/was and no mention of the sacrifices from his mother or all the things she has done for him etc. He told her that he wrote the speech like that to make his dad feel good about the father that he was (he is not a good dad and is pretty much a screw up from the top down) and to boost his ego and make him feel like he really helped him (Travis, the son) become a better man. Then Travis says to her that he's glad she understands and that he cherishes the mom she was/is to him and how she is always so great and how much he loves her. They hugged and it stung me like a hot iron. I told BJ that that scene made me sad. He said that it should make me happy. I said to him, "no...I want that". And I do, and I'm afraid I will never have that. I'm afraid I will never have a child love me that much and say those wonderful things about me. I'm afraid there will be no one to know the sacrifices that I'm willing to make. I'm afraid that there won't be a child that will know that I would walk through fire for him/her. A mother/child bond is so strong and I'm afraid I will never get to experience it. And that really scares me. I've always had that to look forward to and now I feel it rapidly slipping out of sight. I HAVE to get pregnant...I just HAVE to.

Landscape(ing)

Thank you to all of you that responded to my last post! What a wonderful group of readers (and lurkers) I have. You all gave me some very good advice and I appreciate every bit of it. I called a salon to ask about their procedure (but forgot to ask about what kind of wax they use) and was reassured by everything I was told. I was going to go for it but then was shut down because she said that the hair had to be at least 1/4 inch long. Wow...I wasn't expecting that. I'm still going to go through with it. I know it will hurt and unfortunately I hadn't thought about being red and puffy like when people get their eyebrows done. But nonetheless, I'm going to do it. I told BJ about my "landscaping" plan and he was on board until he heard how long the hair has to be. :-) So the plan is to clean myself up right before AF shows up and then let it grow while she is in town and then when she leaves, go to the salon (and hold my breath and maybe cry and scream) and get things taken care of. I need to find out what kind of wax they use there and if they don't use sugar or dry wax then I will see if there is another local place I can go to. Thanks again for all your help with my landscaping ideas! I knew I could count on you guys.

The TTC landscape doesn't look so good this month. I say that because I have no idea what my body is doing this month. Remember, I'm taking a sort of break this cycle....no temping or POAS of the opk kind. I had one instance of EWCM on Saturday afternoon, CD9. I felt pretty good about it because that is a good day to start seeing fertility signs. BJ and I did our thing Saturday night. I figured I'd be ovulating on CD12 or CD13, like usual. Sunday afternoon I started feeling my left ovary pinching. That would be CD10...again. I ovulated on CD10 a couple of cycles ago. Unbelievable....but at least we got in some BD'ing Saturday night, right? Well then I started feeling the pinching on my right ovary. And while I know it's possible to ovulate from both ovaries without medication, it's never happened to me (as far as I can tell) so then I figured that I wasn't feeling the right kind of ovulation pains and that it must be something else. Bottom line, I don't know if I ovulated or not. I felt a few twinges again yesterday and some pretty sharp ones this morning. I'm going to try to seduce the husband tonight just in case I haven't O'd yet and will actually spit that egg out tomorrow...like usual. Keep your fingers crossed.

The landscaping at our house is at a stale mate. We were the first people (of the new houses) to move in and so far, we are the last to get our landscape package. We found out on Friday that the couple that moved in in March got theirs done. BJ was on the phone asap. We just want things done. We don't like to be pests but we want our shrubbery already! The grass is filling in but our house looks so bare without the little flower garden. Plus, I want to plant flowers to really make our house look nice..and give me something to nurture and watch grow, since I'm having such a hard time trying to produce offspring to nurture and watch grow. A message was left to let us know that we are on the schedule for "this week"...whatever. We've been on the schedule for about 3 weeks now. Hopefully when I call BJ this afternoon he will have great news for me.

The get away landscape is looking great! We booked our hotel in Ocean City for Sunday night and will be heading up Sunday morning. We are staying at a place that we have stayed at before. It's nothing fancy but it's ocean front with a balcony and that is important to us. Plus, it's less than $100 with tax. Woo hoo! We are watching the weather closely and are pleased that there is no rain in the forecast. However, the high temperatures are slowly falling into the low 60's. We want to walk the boardwalk and with the ocean breeze it will be quite chilly. As long as there is no rain, we will just bundle up a little bit. Plus, we have each other to keep us warm, right?

Projects

Hello, everyone. I will first get to the TTC stuff since this is an IF blog, after all. I'm on CD6 and I have been faithfully taking my Clomid since Friday. I have felt a few twinges here and there but nothing out of the ordinary. For all I know, I could have a cyst in there messing things up. That's what happened with my first 2 attempts with IUI. I couldn't start the Clomid because of a cyst. Let's hope that there is nothing going on in there but good old fashioned follicle growth...let's say 2 to 3 really good ones. I have 2 more pills to take and then on CD9 (which happens to be April Fool's Day) I will start to POAS of the opk kind. And if I follow my 'general' timeline, we should be BD'ing on the weekend...always a good thing. However, it does fall on the weekend that we have the Little Guy. How does that always happen? Again...positive thoughts.

As some of you know, maybe all of you if you've read back entries, we bought a house in December. This house is a brand new house. And if someone ever tries to tell you that a new house is the way to go because you don't have to worry about doing any projects, they are completely full of it and should be smacked upside their head. :-)

So far, the things that we want to get done are as follows:
- new master bath lights: we hate the builder lights
- extra shelving in our closet and the Little Guy's closet and our laundry room
- kitchen cabinet hardware
- ceramic flooring in kitchen and back splash
- blinds in all windows
- ceiling fans in bedrooms and living room
- light in office
- hooks on back of master bath and hall bath doors for towels...the racks are for 'pretty' towels
- hooks on laundry room door to hang clothes as they come out of the dryer
- switch dryer door to open on the left side
- some sort of organization in the garage
- finish basement with craft room and bathroom
- wood flooring in office, dining room and foyer
- better grade carpet in living room...very high traffic area

There's more that I can't think of right now. And this does not even include all the decorating that needs done and the decisions involved in that process. I can tell you that we have accomplished some things on the list. Other things will wait until we get our tax money. Which is already spent before it even gets here as we need a shed and a lawn tractor and we want to plant some trees.

Saturday we actually found a ceiling fan for the living room. I really like it...now. I hated it yesterday while BJ was trying to put it up. Everything was going great until he had to house the wires in a compartment that was too small. All hell broke loose in our house yesterday afternoon. He was mad and cussing and I was trying to be helpful (even though he's a pain in the butt to try and help because of course I can't do anything right) and kept my mouth shut. It got to a point where I went off and did laundry and left him to sulk. He finished the fan and I didn't even have to help anymore. All was well because it worked when we turned it on. While at the store Saturday, he decided he wanted to put a cat door in our basement door so that we can close the basement door. Smokey's litter box is downstairs and he can't stand the door being opened the least little bit. Another project. And this one was almost as bad as the fan. There were no written directions, only a few pictures. He cut the hole in the door and it was all downhill from there. Things didn't fit, didn't line up, wouldn't stay straight...you name it, it went wrong. I actually thought we were going to have to buy a new door and forget the whole thing. We finally got it installed....and she's scared to death of it. We have been working with her and I'm hoping that she uses it today while we aren't there to put her through a few times. And in my opinion....the cat door bothers me more (and looks worse) than the basement door being open a crack. But whatevah, that's just MY opinion.

We picked out our cabinet hardware and now we need to purchase all of it. One of the master bath lights have been replaced and I'm not exactly sure why he hasn't done the other one. Our bedroom and the Little Guy's playroom have ceiling fans. We have one for the 4th bedroom but it's just sitting on the floor upstairs. A couple of hooks have been hung up. We bought pegboard and hooks for the garage Saturday, just need the shed so we can start getting things out of our way so we can work on organizing the garage. The dryer door was finally switched over 2 weekends ago.

I'm not sure my marriage can take any more projects, at least not ones where 2 people are required. :-) I'm not the most 'construction' minded or talented person out there, but when I try to help, I AM trying to HELP....and I'm doing my best. My dad, my first husband and now this husband all seem to think I can read their minds and that I should be as strong as they are and know what they want me to do without them saying anything. Ugh. How do I end up with these impatient men? I think from now on, I'm going to recommend that he do projects on his own or he can recruit his new buddy next door. They can get together and ooze all the perfection they want while I sit back and just enjoy the finished product. :-)

So if anyone ever tells you that you won't have as many projects at home if you buy a new construction house....please smack them for me. Thanks!

Around and Around We Go...

Three posts in one day...wow, that must be a record. I wanted to welcome everyone to ICLW and do a Happiness post AND a regular post so you are stuck with 3 entries. :-)

I got my hair highlighted Saturday morning. I told the girl what I wanted. She didn't really do what I asked. BJ said that it didn't really look like she did much to the top, as in I still have some pretty dark roots. The reason it looks like that is because she lightened all my hair...so the stuff at the bottom that was already light, is even lighter and the dark stuff at my roots is a little lighter but not much. Ugh. I wish I knew where my regular hair girl was. I know it's petty in the whole big scheme of things, but it's my hair and I look at it several times a day and I don't really like it right now. In about 8 to 12 weeks I'll be going through this all over again when it's time for a cut and color. I bet you can't wait!

I started spotting this morning. I'm a little bummed. Hell, I'm a lot bummed. I was really hoping that something would be different this cycle since we hit the peak time better. I guess it's just onward. Although BJ made another comment about how old he is getting and how we need to get this show on the road. Like I'm not trying. I made him aware of how I realize our clocks are ticking.

We went to a birthday party Saturday afternoon. It was for one of BJ's friend's daughters...she turned 18. And she ran out and got a tattoo before the party. She's a sweet girl and I hope she stays that way. Thankfully no one asked me when we were going to have kids. I was worried, especially since there was a baby there. And even more thankfully, no one asked me if I wanted to hold the baby. Go me!

Sunday was spent looking at patio furniture and pansies. I had no idea how expensive patio furniture is. Even at the "mart" stores. We are going to hit Lowes next weekend because there wasn't anything we really wanted. We need something for the deck (table and chairs) and a couple of chairs for the front porch. We found pansies and then I planted them in our 3 big pots and set them on the porch steps. It was so good to get my hands dirty and sit outside (barefooted) and plant flowers. I can't wait until they finish our yard so that we can really start planting things. The weather was absolutely beautiful both days. We had the windows open and grilled out Friday night and last night...it was great. I love this time of year.

I went to see BJ's doctor (mine is located where we used to live and I didn't want to drive all the way down there so I decided to switch to BJ's long time PCP) Friday afternoon about my hips. Basically, he's a little worried about me. He said that I should not be having this type of pain. He sent me right over to x-ray. Of course I have a small panic attack as I'm walking over there because AF has yet to arrive and they want to x-ray my hips and pelvis. But then I think to myself, "self, why do you even think this will be a problem? you are irritable, bloated and tired...you are not carrying a child in there." And it's a good thing because I went ahead with the x-rays. The tech asked me if there was a chance I was KU and I said no. She asked me if I'd had tubal ligation. I almost laughed. I replied no again. I was getting ready to yell at her that I'm Infertile if she asked me again. If I really thought I was pregnant there is NO WAY that I would have done the x-rays that day. But I had all the signs of AF being just a few days away so I knew I was safe. I also have to have a bunch of blood work done which I will do this Friday. I then go back to see him on 4/6 to see what he has to say. He can't tell much just by talking to me and moving my legs back and forth. I don't know why not. :-)

That was my weekend...low key but very pleasant with wonderful weather. All in all, it was a great weekend. And now on the worst day of the week, AF starts to make her appearance...along with a HUGE thunderstorm out side. It all sort of fits. Mondays are just putrid anyway, then AF starts to show up and it's storming outside....fits my mood perfectly today.

As Promised, A Lengthy Update

I'll try to condense this as much as I can, but as you know I like to blabber so if you click away before you get to the end, my feelings won't be the least hurt. :-)

The snow - we got so much snow that I was off of work for 4 DAYS. I took 2/5 off because I didn't know when everything was going to start and the last thing I wanted to be was one of those people you see on the news stuck in 18 miles of traffic and about to pull their hair out. The Federal Government shut down for 4 days and our office follows their schedule when it comes to weather closings. Then it snowed...and snowed...and snowed. We got about 2 feet. BJ and I took turns shoveling since we only had the one shovel. We started Friday night at 10:00pm. We went back out at 10:00am Saturday and then again at 1:00pm. Each time we shoveled about 5-7 inches off the driveway. Our neighbors came outside and were sort of making fun of us because it was still snowing and we were shoveling and wasting our time. HA! They even let us use an old beat up snow shovel because they were just staying all warm and cozy inside while we worked. I went out Sunday morning at 9:00 and finished the last few inches on our driveway. The sun was out and it was melting the last of the slushy ice...we had a black driveway! I was so happy with myself. The neighbors came out and we let them use our shovel since we were DONE. I was inside by 11:30 chilling on the couch and ready to watch a fabulous hockey game. Then of course it snowed like a maniac again on Wednesday...another 8 or so inches to get rid of. BUT...I was able to get out and get another shovel on Tuesday before it started snowing again. I was out there again shoveling on Thursday. Poor BJ had to work which meant poor me had to do snow removal by myself. He can just drive over that stuff but I can't and won't if I don't have to. Plus, I can't be getting my clothes and shoes messed up in the deep snow, not to mention the Little Guy and I don't want to slip on the ice going in and out of the house. So shovel I did.

Getting Sick - Superbowl Sunday we went to the neighbors (since we couldn't drive anywhere else) to watch the game. I started feeling a sore throat...the same kind BJ had the previous week. It was full blown Monday morning. I'm so congested and tired and just plain BLAH. I'm much better now, but I'm still very congested and my voice is still sounding clogged. So I was out there shoveling in the blizzard which didn't help, but it had to get done, you know?

TTC - My body, as you know, is struggling to get back to some sort of normalcy. I had anticipated ovulating on Sunday and doing the deed on Saturday. I even convinced BJ to hold off until Saturday because I was sure that I'd get the positive opk. Have I ever told you how frustrating my body is? I didn't get the positive that I was after in the morning or the afternoon on Saturday. In fact, the line was so light that I thought I wouldn't get a positive until Monday. And that, ladies and gentlemen, would be a "normal" cycle. BJ and I couldn't help ourselves Saturday night...there's something romantic about being dead tired from shoveling snow and cooped up in the house with nothing else to do. And of COURSE I got my positive Sunday afternoon. DRATS. With more shoveling and feeling sick and hanging with the neighbors to watch the Big Game Sunday night and rushing the Little Guy to bed at just after 10:00, we didn't do anything. Bummer. I definitely O'd on Monday which was CD12 and I am happy about that as it's much closer to a regular cycle than I have had in a while. AF is due to show up Tuesday. I had some ovarian cramping/pinching on Sunday leading me to believe that I have a cyst. I also had some similar feelings yesterday on my right ovary. Well, not really my ovary, it was just left (if I'm looking down) of my right ovary. Not sure what that might mean. I'm hoping that it's not a sign of more cysts...like I'm developing more than just one each month. Man, these are times when I really miss being wanded. And who would have thought THAT was possible? I'm actually starting to feel like AF is coming. I'm hoping that she stays away and that we got lucky with a Blizzard Baby but I'm not getting my hopes up too high.

House - BJ and I went looking for curtains Saturday. We returned a pair and headed to JC Penney. We looked around for about 10 minutes and found a pair almost exactly like the original pair that was too short. The don't carry the longer length in stock so they have to be ordered. No biggie. Yeah, right. There was one lady behind the counter and she was busy helping a 96-year old woman pick out a mattress pad from the catalog. The lady had 35 questions. We waited in line for about 15 to 20 minutes. I told BJ that I would come back Monday by myself to order them. We headed to Lowes to get some other things we need/want for the house. We picked out some nice bathroom lights, picked up a bunch of energy saver light bulbs and bought a ceiling fan for our bedroom. I'm so delighted. BJ put the fan up the other day and I really like it. We still can't seem to find one we like for the living room, though. And we still need hardware for the kitchen cabinets. We were done spending money Saturday so that will have to wait another week or two. I went back to JC Penney Monday to order my curtains. I stood in line for another 20 minutes with one person in front of me. UGH. I finally get up there and tell her exactly what I want and get all the info in the computer only to be told...wait for it...they are on BACK ORDER...until MAY 28! Can you believe that? I ordered them anyway because they were on sale and I NEED these curtains...I WANT these curtains...THESE curtains are going to be the death of me. Well, I may have exaggerated that point, but I think you might understand what I mean. Now my mission is to find a new comforter set for our bedroom. The one we have is 3 1/2 years old and very neutral and very bland. I need to dress my bed up a little and now is time to do that. I mentioned before how picky I have realized I am and this is no exception. I will write more about this and our other house issues later...you've suffered enough.

Valentine's Day - BJ and I have never been big on this day. It's a nice day but it also marks the anniversary of his father's death. However, he never fails to get me a small token of something. We didn't make it to the dance we wanted to go to, but in the morning he pulled out 2 envelopes from our kitchen drawer. I gave him the 2 mini-albums that I had made him with family/couple pictures. He really liked his albums and said that it was better than me buying him a card. The cards he gave me were very sweet. One was a bit mushy and let me know how much he needs me in his life. I need to know that sometimes because he is so self-sufficient that I sometimes wonder if he'd really be inconvenienced in any way with my absence or with a stand-in wife. :-) The other card was humorous look at our relationship. And it fit us perfectly. It stated many things that he can "sometimes" be...stubborn, lazy, grumpy, thinks he's the boss etc...and then the thing that he "always" is is in love with me. It made my heart swell. Not just because it was sweet, but because he obviously recognized himself in that card and it gave him an appreciation for what I put up with from him. :-) We chilled together all day and it was very nice to be with him.

That's about all for now...my hands are tired of typing and I'm sure your eyes are hurting from reading. It's nice to be back to a routine but of course now I have over 100 posts to read from all of you. I'm looking forward to it, though...I've missed you!

100 Posts Already??

I missed this yesterday....I apparently posted my 100th post yesterday. Wow, didn't realize I had done that many. I guess I blabber more than I thought. :-) I am so thankful that I have found this outlet, this diary, this community. It helps so much to get my thoughts and feelings and rants down on "paper". And the best part is that I know there are people out there that are supportive of me, even on my worst days. There's always advice and hugs and even some laughs, that await me when I log in to see comments. Thank you, Readers and Followers, you make it better.

Now for my original post idea for today:
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We are very slowly putting together each room in our house. My parents want to see pictures of us actually "living" in the new place. Empty rooms are nice, but they want the real deal. And since I have become such a neat freak I refuse to take any pictures until the room is just the way I want it. That's why none of you have seen any pictures either. The hall bath (Little Guy's bathroom) is the only room of the house that is done. All the other rooms are coming along nicely, but I don't want anyone to see them yet. I don't know what has happened to me since moving into this house but my tastes have not only changed but I'm not even sure what my tastes are anymore. I used to just throw things together in a room and if a couple things happened to match or coordinate I was happy. Not so much anymore. I want everything to match and coordinate and compliment and "pop" and all those other words I have learned from watching HGTV. This is why it's taking me so long to put my house together. That and I am out of the house for 12 hours a day during the week with little to no time by myself on the weekends to shop for these things. I spent an hour and 20 minutes in a store over the holiday break looking for a shower curtain for our bathroom and ended up leaving with new silverware. It has become a real problem that I can't find what I want...and that has something to do with the fact that I don't KNOW what I want. And even more to do with the fact that I have never decorated anything like this because I'm a tomboy and I don't really have "taste" or an eye for things like this. Whew...glad I got that off my chest.

The kitchen has dark cabinets as seen here with black appliances. I have decided to make the accent color red. I love red all of a sudden. The kitchen table is also a dark color, but more brown than the sedona in the kitchen cabinets. The living room is a big issue right now. The carpet is beige (which I don't like but had to go with because it was the most neutral) and the paint is a bone white. The paint looks like an actual color because of the bright white trim. Our new furniture (that I love) is chocolate brown. the only real color in the room is the pillows that came with the love seats. They are multi-colored and patterned with some geometric shapes and what not. I'm trying to find curtains for our big window. Mainly to add some color and character but also to help keep the cold air out. I want the curtains to only cover the very edges of the windows because I love looking out and I love the natural light. I found some striped (yes, I can't believe I liked them as I'm not usually much on stripes) curtains that had all the colors of the pillows. I was so excited. I bought them and hung them up on a great new curtain rod. They made the room feel so comfy and cozy. BJ even liked them and he doesn't like stripes either. The problem you may ask? They are 84 inches and we really need 96 inches so they graze the floor. We have 9 foot ceilings and 6 foot windows on the first floor. I thought of pulling them back around one of those really nice hook things and that helped. However, they really need to hang to the floor. So it was off to Target and Lowes. Everything at Target was 84 inches. All but one style at Lowes was 84 inches. The ones that were 96 inches were ok and I thought I'd try them. They only came in 4 colors. I picked the one that matched the pillows the best and hung them up. They blend too much with the wall paint. Not enough punch or pizazz. They are the perfect length, though. Total disappointment. They have to go back. BJ and I searched the Internet for almost an hour and couldn't find any pre-made 96 inch curtains that even came close to being as perfect as the original ones. They Lowes curtains are going back tomorrow and at $45 a piece I'm ok with that. I just don't know what to do. I'm not crafty, so making my own is a joke. Back to the drawing board.

Isn't it nice that I'm focusing on curtains when there are some really awful things going on the world right now? I feel very selfish for worrying about such a trivial item in these times. However, the curtains are important to me and as much as I love looking at that window, I need to find a solution. I actually have pictures to hang in the room and a couple of ideas of things to hang in the kitchen eating area so the sooner we get this curtain thing worked out, the sooner I can feel like I live at my house. I'm sure you all just love reading about my house woes when you are trying to live your lives and are facing much more prominent issues. In full disclosure, I am more than aware how lucky I am to even have windows. This blog is about my life and right now, unfortunately, I'm focused on me and my windows.

Starting Anew

I'm not really starting "anew" but I am picking up where I left off, I suppose. I started temping yesterday morning again. I can't tell much from 2 day's worth, but I already know I'm back on track for some odd temps. I was at 97.8 yesterday, which is fine. Then of course today I'm at 98.1. That is usually a post-ovulation temp. Today is CD5 so hopefully I can get a good baseline before I ovulate. And HOPEFULLY I won't ovulate as early as I have been. I'm going to hold out hope. Although, if I stay with a CD9 ovulation, that will mean that we should do some BD'ing Saturday night. Even though we have the Little Guy this weekend, Saturday night fun time is always easier to come by then week night fun time. That would also mean that BJ should be very ready to go by then as we had some activity last night. "Yay" for things seemingly to fall into place. Of course you know this means that I will have a later ovulation and things will get all off schedule and we'll probably miss everything. But AGAIN, I'm holding out hope. I will start opk testing on Friday. I know that's early, but I don't want to miss anything.

My boss was not here Monday so yesterday really felt like my first day back to work. That's a nice thing because today is Wednesday and I was thinking it was Tuesday. I love it when it happens like that. Not so much when I think it's Friday and it's only Thursday.

I am going to a scrapbooking retreat this weekend. I actually took a day off work to attend all 3 days. I'm very excited about it. I haven't worked on anything since early June. I am a year and a half behind on pictures. I'm not staying overnight at the hotel since I live about 5 minutes from it, but it will still be nice to be able to work uninterrupted (for the most part) on my album. I will still be able to have dinner and breakfast with BJ and the Little Guy Saturday and Sunday. Plus, I need to leave Saturday for about 2 hours to attend the Little Guy's very first basketball game. I'm really excited about it. He had his first real practice Monday and seemed to enjoy it so I hope he likes playing in a game just as much. Plus, I can't wait to take some pictures for our album! And since I have the sports cartridge for my Cricut, I will be able to make some very cool layouts. Yes, I'm a scrapping geek. I have my SIL to thank for that. It has really allowed me to try and get in touch with my creative side. I stress the word "try" as I am not that crafty. But it's fun and relaxing (for the most part) and I actually have a finished product when I am done. I've never gone to a 3-day event before. I've done a few full day events and have enjoyed them so hopefully this will go well. You would be surprised how quickly the time passes when you are sitting there working. I don't know anyone (except the 2 consultants running it) that will be there so maybe I will make a new friend. It's hard at these events because people are filling their albums with baby pictures and nursery pictures and birth stories. I don't have much in common with them so it's hard to make a connection. I have pictures of the Little Guy and that definitely makes it less agonizing, but it's not the same as making a baby album or a "first steps" page or something like that. But I'm not going to let that bring me down...I'm going to work and hopefully get through the rest of 2008 pictures and if I get a lot done, I will need to print some pictures at the 1-hour place to work on the rest of the weekend.

BJ is taking off today to go and pick up our love seats! I'm so excited about it. I just wish that our ottoman was in, too. Something more to look forward to. He also needs to get a chest x-ray and an abdominal sonogram. He's had some issues and was supposed to get this stuff done months ago but he is who he is. He said he didn't want any bad news before Christmas. I don't think there is anything wrong with him. He's had 2 or 3 chest x-rays since I've known him and no one ever finds anything. But he gets short of breath at times and he's worried....since he smoked for 20 years or so. He had abdominal pain before and they never found a reason for it. I'm not concerned but I understand his fears. I'm glad he's going today and I hope he can get it done today to put his mind at ease.

We are still dealing with some issues regarding our new house and I now have 3...that's right, 3 holes in 3 different walls in my house. Lovely. I'll explain it all later as this has again gotten very long and the house deserves its own post at this point. Aren't you excited to hear me complain even more?? :-)

Welcome Back

So I haven't updated since 12/23...bad me. I have been reading and keeping up with just about everyone else's blog and I must say...it's pretty busy around here! There has been a lot of activity in the past week and a half to say the least. We have FETs, DEs, IVFs, IUIs galore! I hope that each and every one of you get (and keep) your BFP! So happy and hopeful for all of you...you know who you are.

I'm going to try and keep this short as I have a tendency to babble, as you know. So wish me luck.

Christmas was good. It was nice spending it in our new house together and having the Little Guy wake up there. He was spoiled, as kids should be at this time of year. The not so good part was that we had to give him up at 12:00 so he could spend the rest of the day with his mom and her boyfriend and his kids. We were lonely after he left. And of course the mind starts going in the direction of how I should be pregnant and anticipating the arrival of a Spring baby and how we will never be alone on Christmas day again...SNAP back to reality. We had a nice day together and that is what is really important. My husband also spoiled me this year, as he tends to do at Christmas. I don't get a lot, but I get good quality, thoughtful gifts. I actually enjoy giving more than getting anyway. I received a beautiful red laptop that I named Scarlett. I love Scarlett so far. She is big and shiny and has all kinds of cool software...including Windows 7. I'm still learning some things about Scarlett so it will take me a while before we are best buds, but we are getting there. I also got a Kindle. I have been talking about it for well over a year now and I never expected to actually own one, but I do. I downloaded my first book today and completely enjoyed clicking through the pages on my lunch break. I just wish that I could get all of my blogs on there...that would ROCK.

If we didn't have a Christmas party to attend on the Sunday after Christmas, the tree and all the decorations would have come down. I waited until Monday morning to take everything down. I was so tired of looking at it. I have had a really hard time with my favorite holiday this year and I just can't pinpoint why. I'm hoping that next year I will be back to my regular self again. I normally don't take any Christmas stuff down until January 1.

We spent NY's with BJ's sister and another couple at the sister's house. We wanted to ring in the new year at our new house but his sister already had plans with this other couple that they usually spend that time with so we adjusted. It was fun. The kids and adults took turns playing the Wii and we had a fun time. We left about 2 minutes after midnight, though. :-)

We went to 5 furniture stores looking for a new couch and love seat on NY's day. We found a set that we really liked at one place but had to give up on it because the arms were not padded much and it was as if there was a metal rod in there...not comfy. We couldn't decide if we wanted reclining furniture or a set with an ottoman. I love an ottoman but BJ was partial to the recliners...he IS a man after all. So we set out again on Saturday. After about 2 1/2 hours at a big store, we settled upon a set (with an over sized ottoman!) only to figure out that it probably would be too big for the room. UGH! Since when did furniture shopping get so hard? We decided to get 2 loveseats instead of a loveseat and sofa. We think it will be great in the room and with the over sized ottoman, it will offer plenty of seating for people. Plus, with our new kitchen table (on order) everyone will feel like they are in the same room anyway! Yay! We also bought the little guy his bunk beds. No mattresses yet, though. We don't like the bunk bed mattress as they are thin and I'm sure not very good for you. So we are looking around for inexpensive but decent mattresses that will last him for many years to come. Good luck to us. The bed he has now will do until we get mattresses.

I worked in the new house on my first Monday off more than I thought I would. I unpacked box after box after box. Our garage is full of empty boxes just waiting for the new neighbors to come and get them for when they move in in a few weeks. Go me! It took me 8 hours but I got about 90% unpacked. I'm pretty proud of myself. I also think I burned myself out because I haven't unpacked anything else since!

On the TTC side of things (since this is an infertility blog after all), my lovely body has decided to go haywire again. My period started on 1/2 giving me a 23 day cycle. WTH is THAT? Unbelievable. Well, these days I'm beginning to believe just about anything is possible with my body. It just sucks to be so unpredictable. I'm not used to it. I'm really thinking about calling the new RE/OB and seeing if I can meet with him again and let him know what's been going on with me to see if we can figure something out. I don't know why I'm procrastinating with this. I think it's because I know my only option is IVF and I can't afford it right now, if ever again. I would love to do a Clomid cycle without injections and monitoring and all that but I'm not very good at asking for things like that. I feel like a burden even though I'm the patient and I should have some say in my treatment. I'll talk it over with BJ and see what he thinks. I need to dig my bbt out of my purse so I can get back in the habit of temping again. Less than a month of not doing it and I'm already out of sync.

I have a lot more to say but I'll save it for another day as this is getting pretty long. To give you a preview, we are having some problems with our new house. I know, who would have thunk it?

I'm wishing for a great 2010 and babies for us all! I hope that all of you that are in the 2ww of whatever procedure you are undergoing get a great BFP that sticks and brings you much joy!

Last Day of Work Until January 4!

Yay for a long break! I haven't had a long break at all this year. I've taken a day or two here and there off, but I haven't had any real TIME off. Until now, that is. Today is my last day of work until January 4 and I couldn't be happier. Plus, the office is like a ghost town so there is plenty of time to get caught up with blogs and personal business. :-)

The new house is coming along slowly. You would think that being snowed in over the weekend would have yielded a lot of results as far as unpacking and organizing. You'd be wrong. We woke up Saturday morning to about 6-8 inches of snow. We had breakfast and BJ drank 2 cups of coffee. It was time to head outside to start digging. We were out there for about 2 hours taking turns shoveling. We had to take turns because we were not smart enough when we bought the snow shovel 2 years ago to buy 2. It was so disappointing to see our foot prints nearly filled in after those 2 hours of digging. We needed a break. And who wants to unpack and organize after spending 2 hours shoveling snow? Not us. We went back out a few hours later and had even more snow to shovel. Another 2 hours out there and we were wondering when it was going to stop. We decided not to shovel in the dark and to clean off the deck so that we could grill up some pork chops. We cleaned and swept the deck off. BJ came in and got the meat ready and we decided to have some potatoes with the pork chops. By that time...all of 40 minutes maybe...there was almost another inch on the deck! Good grief, as Charlie Brown would say. Sunday morning before we even ate breakfast we were out there again, shoveling. Finally we had blacktop and it wasn't covered 10 minutes later. The snow stopped about 10:00 Saturday night and I think we got about 18-20 inches...depending on where you measure.

The best part about the snow storm was that this is the first time I've been able to sit on my couch and watch the snow fall out of a big window...it was beautiful. And to have the fire going and the tree lights on...it was definitely a nice way to spend the day. Aside from all the exhausting shoveling.

We met the people that will be living across the street from us. Not sure what to think of them yet. The woman asked me if we had kids and I told her that BJ has a son and she asked "how old?" I told her 8 and she said, "oh that's a good age....no babies." Her husband then said, "yeah, she's fine with anything over 3 or so." WTF?? We had a long conversation with them out in the cold. They have not been having a good experience with their builder so it was a lot of bitching and complaining. I will have to give them another chance when things aren't so stressful for them.

My phone line at home has not been fixed yet. That means, no phone and no Internet. I had to go to the library Monday to use the computer. Very frustrating. I need to call the phone company again but I'm so tired of them telling me that it's on the schedule to be fixed. DO YOUR JOB!! Would they want to be at home with no phone service for this long? I don't think so. What if I have to call 911 for some kind of emergency? Yes, we have cell service at this house, but that is SO not the point. I need my Internet! I'm going to be home for over a week...do you know how many blog entries I will miss??? AARGH!

Ok, enough griping. I wrapped the gifts for BJ's family last night and it wasn't that many but I was so tired of wrapping when I was done. I'm going to wrap the Little Guy's gifts tonight and BJ's as well. I still need to get a few stocking stuffers but other than that, I'm done. I'm hoping to feel more Christmassy once the presents are wrapped. It's been hard this year with moving and not really having the time to decorate the way I want. Plus, I keep thinking about how I should be 5 months pregnant right now. That is the really hard part. I'm missing my lost embryos. I know that sounds silly, but I can't help it. Bedroom #4 stares at me every time I walk passed it. It's completely empty except a few things in the closet. It should be the nursery. I think it will get easier to deal with once the Little Guy gets his bunkbeds and we move his bed into that room and make it a real guest room. I hope it gets easier.

In case I don't get Internet while I'm on break I want to wish all of my blogging buddies a very Merry Christmas and a wonderful New Year! And may we ALL get our 2010 BFP's sooner rather than later! Hugs and kisses to you all!