I took the first step. Now I sit here and wait for the phone to ring and hope that it does. I called the OB/GYN that I had a consult with in October and left a message with his office that I'd like to talk to him about my case. I'm going to ask him what he thinks of prescribing me 50mg of Clomid for a month or 2. I'm nervous as hell because I've never been this proactive. I've never outright asked for something without a doctor first recommending it to me. I hope he calls me back because the receptionist/nurse said that he can be "inconsistent" with phone calls. We'll see.
It's CD1 and I wanted to do something special for myself. So I'm giving myself some hope. I know the realities of it and that the Clomid probably won't do anything for me other than make me ovulate (which I do on my own anyway) but it will make me feel less helpless, like I'm actually DOING something to get knocked up. Hell, maybe it will make me ovulate on a more regular day like CD13 or even *gasp* CD14.
Please call me back, doctor.
Showing posts with label new doctor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label new doctor. Show all posts
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Doctor Appointment Updates
I was so impressed Tuesday at my thyroid doc's office...I got there 10 minutes early and was taken back after only sitting there 20 minutes. Then I sat in the back room waiting for another 20 minutes...this must be a record. In walks my doctor.....ABOUT 6 MONTHS PREGNANT! What are the chances? So I say to her, "oh! look at you!" and she's a little evasive and replies, "yes, a little bit of a change." Whatever. She must have just gotten pregnant right around the last time I saw her. Just my luck. Anyway, she asked me to get more blood work and told me she would call me after she got the results. She thinks she may need to increase my meds a little. All in all it was quick and painless...aside from having to concentrate on her face as she was talking instead of drooling over her big belly.
My OB/GYN appointment went well also. I was lucky enough not to have to face any (obvious) fertiles while there. He is a very nice man and very attentive. I hadn't gotten my records beforehand but he suggested just dropping them off when I get them. Wouldn't you know they came about an hour after I got to work yesterday? Hmph. We went over my history. He asked a lot of questions. He played out several scenarios that he would normally use on someone that was just beginning this journey. Those didn't apply to me. I've already been through just about everything as far as he could tell. He sees no evidence that I have bad eggs. His belief is that I suffer from decreased ovarian reserve (DOR). He doesn't think increasing stims or decreasing stims would have any effect on the number of follicles/eggs produced. He actually said that the number of mature eggs that came from my IVF is consistent with the number of follicles I had...percentage-wise. That made me feel a little better. He is against doing a uterine biopsy as he says it's pretty painful and not that informative. He doesn't think I need a Lap procedure because he said that I don't really "present" like I have endo and since I've had so many sonos over the last year he sees no need to search for polyps. Unfortunately, he thinks my best course of action is IVF. I knew this, but was hoping for something else...you know, something I can actually do and afford.
He said that if it were him doing it (he can't as this hospital does not have the capabilities...he can't even give u/s yet as his equipment is on order) he would not have put me on BCP for my 2nd attempt at IVF #1. He thinks that no matter the amount of stims, I would only produce 3-5 good follicles. He said that 10 days may have still been too long. He would recommend a minimum stimulation IVF. Meaning no BCP, clomid, FSH, and an antagonist. He said that BCP do not diminish cysts, they only stop new ones from forming. He would rather aspirate a troublesome cyst rather than keep suppressing me as was done by the clinic. He is most interested in my FSH levels. I was certain that they were checked on CD3 every time but that was not the case after looking over my records. It seems they only checked it once and it was borderline high...just under 10. He said that is what makes the difference in the number of follicles produced.
He made sure to let me know that he, in no way, was saying that big clinics are just trying to get their numbers up but that sometimes the focus is lost due to "mass treatment of patients". Makes sense to me. He has a friend and (in his words) mentor that has a clinic in Northern VA that he could call and see how much it would cost for a fresh cycle. He called him while I was sitting right there. I was impressed with that. The cost would be about $5,500. Still out of reach, but much more doable than the $7,900 from my clinic (with my discount). There are ways I can come up with that kind of money. It will just take a little time. And this is presuming that we are not broke after we move into our new house. :-) He also said that he didn't know if any follow up visits with him would be covered by my insurance (the first consult definitely is) but when I drop my records off for him to review, we could talk informally. I thought that was very kind of him. He also said that he has quite a few friends that still work at Johns Hopkins (where he's from and where he was certified) that he could call for me if I wanted him to. Again, I like the way this guy thinks.
I'm not sure if I want to make an appointment to take my records or just send them to him and maybe do a phone consult. I will have to figure that out.
I want to thank everyone for their kind words about our new house. I wish I could have you all over once it's ready and we could sit around the fire and chat it up all night. That would be fun. We are going to a home show Saturday and I'm very excited about that. I've never been to one because I've never really had a reason. I've seen the commercials and the flyers and always wished I could go and look around...now I get to. Wouldn't it be nice if in 2 weeks I could say the same thing about Motherhood Maternity?
I didn't have a temp spike this morning like I should have. However, that is not abnormal for me...to get my spike the next day, but I was hoping for it just to confirm that we timed everything correctly. I'm very confident but there is always the part of me that wonders about what my body is actually doing in there.
My OB/GYN appointment went well also. I was lucky enough not to have to face any (obvious) fertiles while there. He is a very nice man and very attentive. I hadn't gotten my records beforehand but he suggested just dropping them off when I get them. Wouldn't you know they came about an hour after I got to work yesterday? Hmph. We went over my history. He asked a lot of questions. He played out several scenarios that he would normally use on someone that was just beginning this journey. Those didn't apply to me. I've already been through just about everything as far as he could tell. He sees no evidence that I have bad eggs. His belief is that I suffer from decreased ovarian reserve (DOR). He doesn't think increasing stims or decreasing stims would have any effect on the number of follicles/eggs produced. He actually said that the number of mature eggs that came from my IVF is consistent with the number of follicles I had...percentage-wise. That made me feel a little better. He is against doing a uterine biopsy as he says it's pretty painful and not that informative. He doesn't think I need a Lap procedure because he said that I don't really "present" like I have endo and since I've had so many sonos over the last year he sees no need to search for polyps. Unfortunately, he thinks my best course of action is IVF. I knew this, but was hoping for something else...you know, something I can actually do and afford.
He said that if it were him doing it (he can't as this hospital does not have the capabilities...he can't even give u/s yet as his equipment is on order) he would not have put me on BCP for my 2nd attempt at IVF #1. He thinks that no matter the amount of stims, I would only produce 3-5 good follicles. He said that 10 days may have still been too long. He would recommend a minimum stimulation IVF. Meaning no BCP, clomid, FSH, and an antagonist. He said that BCP do not diminish cysts, they only stop new ones from forming. He would rather aspirate a troublesome cyst rather than keep suppressing me as was done by the clinic. He is most interested in my FSH levels. I was certain that they were checked on CD3 every time but that was not the case after looking over my records. It seems they only checked it once and it was borderline high...just under 10. He said that is what makes the difference in the number of follicles produced.
He made sure to let me know that he, in no way, was saying that big clinics are just trying to get their numbers up but that sometimes the focus is lost due to "mass treatment of patients". Makes sense to me. He has a friend and (in his words) mentor that has a clinic in Northern VA that he could call and see how much it would cost for a fresh cycle. He called him while I was sitting right there. I was impressed with that. The cost would be about $5,500. Still out of reach, but much more doable than the $7,900 from my clinic (with my discount). There are ways I can come up with that kind of money. It will just take a little time. And this is presuming that we are not broke after we move into our new house. :-) He also said that he didn't know if any follow up visits with him would be covered by my insurance (the first consult definitely is) but when I drop my records off for him to review, we could talk informally. I thought that was very kind of him. He also said that he has quite a few friends that still work at Johns Hopkins (where he's from and where he was certified) that he could call for me if I wanted him to. Again, I like the way this guy thinks.
I'm not sure if I want to make an appointment to take my records or just send them to him and maybe do a phone consult. I will have to figure that out.
I want to thank everyone for their kind words about our new house. I wish I could have you all over once it's ready and we could sit around the fire and chat it up all night. That would be fun. We are going to a home show Saturday and I'm very excited about that. I've never been to one because I've never really had a reason. I've seen the commercials and the flyers and always wished I could go and look around...now I get to. Wouldn't it be nice if in 2 weeks I could say the same thing about Motherhood Maternity?
I didn't have a temp spike this morning like I should have. However, that is not abnormal for me...to get my spike the next day, but I was hoping for it just to confirm that we timed everything correctly. I'm very confident but there is always the part of me that wonders about what my body is actually doing in there.
Monday, October 26, 2009
CD10 - Steady and Slow
Today's title refers to my ovulation cycle and our new house. This time last month, I was ovulating...not so much this time around. In fact, I have taken 4 opk's and they have all been negative. So negative in fact, that a 2nd line is nowhere to be seen. I'm hoping that is because ovulation is still a few days away and not that I have crappy opk's under my bathroom sink, in my book bag and in my purse...I think those are the only places I have stored them. :-) We are trying to time our baby makin' encounters better but the way my cycles have been the past few months has made it tough to do so. I am at the point where I am going to test twice a day because I have noticed that if I am negative in the morning, I could be positive that evening and we don't want to miss anything. My temps are running about what they should. Maybe a tenth of a degree or so higher than normal, but they are not all over the place like last month. At least not yet.
We went by our house yesterday and the workers were there hanging drywall! Yay! Things looked so different with the walls closed in. And the walls where there was no drywall we could see the insulation. The Little Guy was bummed because he couldn't "run through the walls" anymore. He hadn't been there since the electric got put in and now he not only had wires and cables running everywhere but insulation and drywall. BJ talked to the project manager today and pleaded (in a non pain in the ass way) to see if there was any way to get us in the house a week earlier. He said he'd do his best. That's all we can ask, right? The siding guys are there today and should be able to get a good chunk of that done before the rain comes tomorrow. I will go by there after work to check things out. And that reminds me...I need to post some more pictures.
I talked with my clinic last week to make sure they got my request for my medical records. They did, thankfully. I was told that the company that comes in to make copies (WHAT? There isn't someone in your office that can make copies??) will be in today. My request for my records to be delivered to me by tomorrow via e-mail has been noted. That's about all I can do. Keep your fingers crossed that I get them. I actually started a notebook with a quick, non-technical run down of what I have done over the passed 8 or so years. I don't have any bloodwork results or anything like that, but I can at least tell him a quick story. I can't even tell you how many different emotions I'm having over this appointment. I'm excited, but of course I don't want to get too excited because we can't afford any "real" treatments. However, just the thought of talking to someone new about our situation has me all giddy. I never had a real sit down of the getting-to-know-you type with Dr. M so I'm really ready for this. However, I have a feeling when I go in there, I'll probably be stammering around trying to remember my own name. BJ is actually interested in this appointment, too. Of course not enough to come, but he has asked me about it a few times and that's saying something. I have a feeling he will actually listen with both ears when I give him the run down of what the doc and I talked about.
We went by our house yesterday and the workers were there hanging drywall! Yay! Things looked so different with the walls closed in. And the walls where there was no drywall we could see the insulation. The Little Guy was bummed because he couldn't "run through the walls" anymore. He hadn't been there since the electric got put in and now he not only had wires and cables running everywhere but insulation and drywall. BJ talked to the project manager today and pleaded (in a non pain in the ass way) to see if there was any way to get us in the house a week earlier. He said he'd do his best. That's all we can ask, right? The siding guys are there today and should be able to get a good chunk of that done before the rain comes tomorrow. I will go by there after work to check things out. And that reminds me...I need to post some more pictures.
I talked with my clinic last week to make sure they got my request for my medical records. They did, thankfully. I was told that the company that comes in to make copies (WHAT? There isn't someone in your office that can make copies??) will be in today. My request for my records to be delivered to me by tomorrow via e-mail has been noted. That's about all I can do. Keep your fingers crossed that I get them. I actually started a notebook with a quick, non-technical run down of what I have done over the passed 8 or so years. I don't have any bloodwork results or anything like that, but I can at least tell him a quick story. I can't even tell you how many different emotions I'm having over this appointment. I'm excited, but of course I don't want to get too excited because we can't afford any "real" treatments. However, just the thought of talking to someone new about our situation has me all giddy. I never had a real sit down of the getting-to-know-you type with Dr. M so I'm really ready for this. However, I have a feeling when I go in there, I'll probably be stammering around trying to remember my own name. BJ is actually interested in this appointment, too. Of course not enough to come, but he has asked me about it a few times and that's saying something. I have a feeling he will actually listen with both ears when I give him the run down of what the doc and I talked about.
Monday, October 19, 2009
CD3 - Here Comes the Sun...
I am so happy to see the sun today...and the blue sky. I haven't seen the sun or the blue sky since last Wednesday. It has been cold, wet and dreary for days. I hate this kind of weather. I am a sunshine and 80 degree girl. I should be living in Southern California. That, after all, is where I got spoiled on the weather.
I went to a scrapbooking crop yesterday. I love scrapping. I haven't done any since early June. The Croptoberfest event last year was my first real experience with scrapping. So basically I hit my 1 year anniversary with it. I have completed my wedding album and a "family" album so far. When I started this hobby last year, I fully believed that I would have a baby album to start on very soon as BJ and I had just had our initial consultation with the Clinic. Well, here I am a year later and no closer to that album. I dream about doing one of those every time I see the pretty pink and blue paper and embellishments. I have actually started avoiding those items in the craft store. It's starting to sting. And when I go to crops, most of the women there are working on albums that include their kids and/or babies galore. I have the Little Guy to talk about and show pictures of but I always have to confess that he is my step-son. Then the question always comes..."so, do you have any kids of your own?". And I have to say, "no, not yet...hopefully soon." It never gets easier to deal with those questions no matter how long you have been at this. Maybe one day I will get to use that beautiful paper and those cute little stickers...
I called to request my medical records for my appointment with the new doctor and they told me it could take up to 3 WEEKS to get them. Great. Just. My. Luck. That, and they want to charge me .73 per page. As if they don't already have enough of my money. So it looks like I will be seeing the doctor with no records. BJ said not to change my appointment and to still go in and talk to him so that's what I'm going to do. I will make some notes of what I remember and also give him the low down on my cycles these past few months. Hopefully that will be enough to maybe get him to give me some Clomid. BJ also made the comment that we need to be better about timing. I agreed and then followed up with "I try not to nag you about that...". He didn't really respond but he knows he has issues about timing. Admitting there is a problem is the first step to fixing it, right?
AF is basically gone. There has been nothing today and I mean nothing to speak of. I love the shortness but as usual, I dread there is a bad reason for it. I basically started to really spot Friday...in the late morning early afternoon. By 9:00pm it was basically a flow...too late in the day to be considered CD1 (at least by my clinic's standards). I had a medium (for me) flow Saturday and a light flow yesterday and she's practically gone today. It kind of makes waiting for O harder because once I'm done, I like to know that O is just a few days away, not a week or more. Gotta love the human body.
Thank you all for your replies from Friday. It's good to know that I can come here and be a raving lunatic once in a while and that I'm not the one getting burned at the stake for it. :-)
I went to a scrapbooking crop yesterday. I love scrapping. I haven't done any since early June. The Croptoberfest event last year was my first real experience with scrapping. So basically I hit my 1 year anniversary with it. I have completed my wedding album and a "family" album so far. When I started this hobby last year, I fully believed that I would have a baby album to start on very soon as BJ and I had just had our initial consultation with the Clinic. Well, here I am a year later and no closer to that album. I dream about doing one of those every time I see the pretty pink and blue paper and embellishments. I have actually started avoiding those items in the craft store. It's starting to sting. And when I go to crops, most of the women there are working on albums that include their kids and/or babies galore. I have the Little Guy to talk about and show pictures of but I always have to confess that he is my step-son. Then the question always comes..."so, do you have any kids of your own?". And I have to say, "no, not yet...hopefully soon." It never gets easier to deal with those questions no matter how long you have been at this. Maybe one day I will get to use that beautiful paper and those cute little stickers...
I called to request my medical records for my appointment with the new doctor and they told me it could take up to 3 WEEKS to get them. Great. Just. My. Luck. That, and they want to charge me .73 per page. As if they don't already have enough of my money. So it looks like I will be seeing the doctor with no records. BJ said not to change my appointment and to still go in and talk to him so that's what I'm going to do. I will make some notes of what I remember and also give him the low down on my cycles these past few months. Hopefully that will be enough to maybe get him to give me some Clomid. BJ also made the comment that we need to be better about timing. I agreed and then followed up with "I try not to nag you about that...". He didn't really respond but he knows he has issues about timing. Admitting there is a problem is the first step to fixing it, right?
AF is basically gone. There has been nothing today and I mean nothing to speak of. I love the shortness but as usual, I dread there is a bad reason for it. I basically started to really spot Friday...in the late morning early afternoon. By 9:00pm it was basically a flow...too late in the day to be considered CD1 (at least by my clinic's standards). I had a medium (for me) flow Saturday and a light flow yesterday and she's practically gone today. It kind of makes waiting for O harder because once I'm done, I like to know that O is just a few days away, not a week or more. Gotta love the human body.
Thank you all for your replies from Friday. It's good to know that I can come here and be a raving lunatic once in a while and that I'm not the one getting burned at the stake for it. :-)
Friday, October 16, 2009
Out of Denial and a New Spark
I'm going to be blunt, and a little vulgar in this post. I'm not usually a cusser unless I'm driving or watching sports. But right now I'm pissed off. If foul language offends you, please read no further.
My fucking period is here. The dumb bitch showed up after all. Of course I knew she would, but still...I fucking hate this infertility shit. I haven't cried about a period coming in a long time but I'm on the verge right now. I had some brown spotting this morning and forgot to bring a pantie liner so I'm wearing a fucking pad and each time I go to the bathroom, there's a little more on there. (The tampons that I have here at work are all Super, my Regulars are at home.) And this last time? Fucking red on the TP. Shit, shit, shit. I am so mad at my body. And then I'm so mad at all the fertiles. So many of them have no idea how fucking hard this is. They get to prance around with their big, beautiful bellies and then tote their beautiful babies around while the rest of us are standing on the sidelines like hobos begging for money. Except of course we are begging for babies.
The "why?" question never gets answered and it never will. I know I'm not alone and that millions of other women suffer IF, too. However, right now it's MY turn to bitch and moan and throw my pity party. Except I don't want to throw a pity party, I want to throw a pity RIOT. I want us all to march in the streets with torches and banners and mega phones. And we could chant things like:
-What do we want? - BABIES
-When do we want them? - NOW
I want to gather up the people that tell us to "just relax" and "oh, don't worry so much...it will happen when it's time" and I want to burn them at the stake while we all look on, laughing at them and telling THEM to just relax....the burning will stop hurting when it's TIME.
I know, I'm a little morbid. I get that way when I'm angry and when I feel slighted and when my period is starting because I'm once again NOT FUCKING PREGNANT and I have hormones that let me be bitchy because I can just blame it on my PERIOD. There, enough said on that. I'm sorry if I have disturbed anyone but I'm venting and of course I'm not really a violent person I'm just so tired of all of this. And this leads me to my new spark.
BJ was reading the local paper yesterday evening and stumbled upon an article that he wanted to share with me. He passed it over and the title caught my eye immediately. The local hospital has just acquired a new OB/GYN that specializes in infertility. He completed a three-year fellowship in reproductive endocrinology and infertility at Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine. I checked to see if the practice that he joined takes my insurance and they do. I only have coverage for diagnostics and drugs, no treatments. However, I want to sit down and talk with him and let him look over my records to see if there is anything he can tell me that would help us on this journey. I called the office and made an appointment for 10/28 at 9:00am, first of the day. I asked if he runs on time and was told that sometimes he runs late because he really likes to talk with patients and get to know them and their situation. I'm glad I am first in that morning. I don't know if he can offer anything new, especially since we have no money for him, but maybe a fresh set of eyes will spark something.
My fucking period is here. The dumb bitch showed up after all. Of course I knew she would, but still...I fucking hate this infertility shit. I haven't cried about a period coming in a long time but I'm on the verge right now. I had some brown spotting this morning and forgot to bring a pantie liner so I'm wearing a fucking pad and each time I go to the bathroom, there's a little more on there. (The tampons that I have here at work are all Super, my Regulars are at home.) And this last time? Fucking red on the TP. Shit, shit, shit. I am so mad at my body. And then I'm so mad at all the fertiles. So many of them have no idea how fucking hard this is. They get to prance around with their big, beautiful bellies and then tote their beautiful babies around while the rest of us are standing on the sidelines like hobos begging for money. Except of course we are begging for babies.
The "why?" question never gets answered and it never will. I know I'm not alone and that millions of other women suffer IF, too. However, right now it's MY turn to bitch and moan and throw my pity party. Except I don't want to throw a pity party, I want to throw a pity RIOT. I want us all to march in the streets with torches and banners and mega phones. And we could chant things like:
-What do we want? - BABIES
-When do we want them? - NOW
I want to gather up the people that tell us to "just relax" and "oh, don't worry so much...it will happen when it's time" and I want to burn them at the stake while we all look on, laughing at them and telling THEM to just relax....the burning will stop hurting when it's TIME.
I know, I'm a little morbid. I get that way when I'm angry and when I feel slighted and when my period is starting because I'm once again NOT FUCKING PREGNANT and I have hormones that let me be bitchy because I can just blame it on my PERIOD. There, enough said on that. I'm sorry if I have disturbed anyone but I'm venting and of course I'm not really a violent person I'm just so tired of all of this. And this leads me to my new spark.
BJ was reading the local paper yesterday evening and stumbled upon an article that he wanted to share with me. He passed it over and the title caught my eye immediately. The local hospital has just acquired a new OB/GYN that specializes in infertility. He completed a three-year fellowship in reproductive endocrinology and infertility at Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine. I checked to see if the practice that he joined takes my insurance and they do. I only have coverage for diagnostics and drugs, no treatments. However, I want to sit down and talk with him and let him look over my records to see if there is anything he can tell me that would help us on this journey. I called the office and made an appointment for 10/28 at 9:00am, first of the day. I asked if he runs on time and was told that sometimes he runs late because he really likes to talk with patients and get to know them and their situation. I'm glad I am first in that morning. I don't know if he can offer anything new, especially since we have no money for him, but maybe a fresh set of eyes will spark something.
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