1dpo - Not All Hope is Lost - EDITED

Let me tell you....yesterday I felt like someone was stabbing my ovary, twisting it up and trying to rip it out. Of course this is my left ovary. The one that hurts the most and the one that usually gets the functioning cyst and the one that is slower to respond to stims and the one that hurt the most after my ER. I haven't had that much pain while ovulating in a LONG ass time. It got so bad that I had to breath through it as though I were in labor. I've never been in labor, but I've heard LOTS of stories. I finally took some Motrin and it either eased the pain or the pain just lessened as the day went on as it usually does.

We had Chinese food for dinner last night. I ordered my favorite, General Tso's Chicken, and a large steamed rice with 2 shrimp egg rolls. The Little Guy was with his mom last night and one order is enough for just BJ and me. For some reason they gave me 3 fortune cookies. I'm mad at myself for forgetting to bring them in because I wanted to quote them word for word. Alas, I am a forgetting fool these days. We ate dinner and cleaned up and then I remembered about the cookies. I gave BJ his, took mine and began opening it and set the third one on the table. I smiled when I read (and this is paraphrasing) "When winter comes, you will be successful". BJ asked me what mine said and I made him wait until he read his. HIS SAID THE EXACT SAME THING! We started laughing. I was going to save the third one for the Little Guy but now I just HAD to know what it said. When I opened it I read out loud, "All your hard work will soon pay off". BJ laughed and said that he guesses we will both do something good at work. And I said, "no...what if we get pregnant this winter?" He said that would be cool. And then I said that I'd much prefer that it happen before winter gets here but I'll take it.

Remember how I was upset with him yesterday for not "performing" for me like every good little monkey should? And you should read that with complete sarcasm because I in NO WAY think of my husband that way. He proceeds to tell me that he'd actually prefer it happen next month when he isn't on his meds anymore because it has him a bit concerned. I felt like a fink. I thought he was just avoiding the babymaking stress but in actuality he was a bit freaked out by his medicine and how it might affect a growing baby. So all hope in him is not lost. :-) Plus, he did mention how we were active about 36 to 40 hours before I ovulated so there is still a chance. I'm not naive, I know the odds aren't good and that we really should have done it Tuesday...but I'll play along and be hopeful for another cycle. What have I got to lose? Besides my sanity.

So I start another 2ww today. And the fun begins of analyzing everything and thinking and dreaming and wondering and...oh hell, you know the drill.

***our fortunes said, "When winter comes, Heaven will rain success on you". Much better than how I remember it.